should I tell my GP that I cant cope

[in_BPD_hell]

Hi I have an appointment in an hour and a halfs time. I don't know what to say. I cant cope. I dunno what to do but im scared to tell her. what shall I do?

[sherlock holmes]

I hope your appointment went well. What did you decide to say in the end?

If by any chance you read this before you go in then yes I think you should be honest and explain how you feel.

[in_BPD_hell]

Thanks. It was a complete waste of time

[Shenanigans]

Why do you feel it was a waste of time? Were you able to speak about how you're feeling?

[Wonderland.]

I'm sorry to hear that.

Would you like to talk about what happened?

[in_BPD_hell]

I told her how I was feeling... In detail. I said i was worried. She said 'yes that is worrying' and 'I'm sorry you feel that way' I will see you again in 2 weeks. That's it!!' I mean I know there is no magic wand

[sherlock holmes]

Well the positive is that she is obviously concerned and wants to see you again soon to make sure you're okay.

Maybe before your next appointment you can think what you want to happen and what you want your GP to do.

-Medication? Increase, change?
-Therapy/counselling? Do you want to be referred?
-Work- Do you want to be signed off, do you want to ask if you can go back for a few hours, do you want to try voluntary work to keep you busy?

[in_BPD_hell]

Hi Thanks for your message. I don't know what I want her to do. Im just feeling really stressed at the moment and feel a bit lost.

Thanks for the suggestions -
I am not on any medication. The psych said I don't need any. Not sure why. I feel like I do need something.

I have been referred for CAT - which is a therapy for my self harming behaviours. I had a phone call off them today. The waiting list is now 40 weeks... so that's not happening any time soon.

I would love to be in work but since the psych rang my boss they wont let me back and keep asking me to promise that this 'bad patch' is behind me... and that 'I will not ever do this again' I really wish I could promise that.

I have a psych review on Friday. The consultant that I saw, although I hated her. she knew me well. I am seeing her junior who, bless her, is crap. So I don't hold out much hope for that either.

On top of this I have found out my hubby and I need IVF if we are to have a baby, and basically because of my weight and mental health issues we cant have it. so that's more stress. Its getting too much

[sherlock holmes]

I'd ask your GP about medication and if she thinks it would benefit you.

It's good that you've been referred for CAT, though not good there's such a long waiting list. I'd get in contact with your local Rethink or MIND and see if you can see them for some short term counselling in the meantime.

With your work I think that your boss does not sound understanding or sympathetic if they expect you to put what happened behind you and never feel like that again. You have a mental health problem and it won't suddenly disappear. Yes you can recover but it takes time and for a while you'll be a bit more vulnerable to low mood and so on. I'd consider a change of job to something less stressful, maybe voluntary work in the meantime while you still aren't feeling so good. I think Rethink/MIND can help you find suitable work that fits in with your mental health.

Sorry to hear about IVF. I know it hurts right now that you can't have it due to mental health/weight reasons but I think actually now would be the wrong time for you to conceive. Becoming pregnant and having a baby is an extremely stressful time and you would do so much better to wait until you are stable and well before thinking about children. Plus if you have recovered your mental health wont be a barrier for IVF and it will be easier to lose weight if you aren't depressed.

[in_BPD_hell]

Hi

Thanks, I feel like such a failure. This is all my own doing, all of it. I wish I had been successful in my suicide attempt and then I wouldn't have to face all this

[in_BPD_hell]

Im seeing the psych tomorrow... any advice on what I should say?