I have been debating for the past week or so whether to make this thread because I don't want it to turn into 'why liv is a crap mod who cant do her job' or similar. But after receiving a number of really quite abusive/rude PMs now from a number of different members I thought it might just be easier to make a thread.
If you have ever PMd me before its probably fallen into 2 different camps, either you get a reply straight away or you dont get a reply and you have to send me a PM again. Its very likely that your PM falls into the second camp, but I would like to make it clear that I dont read the PM and think 'what a stupid message/Im not going to deal with it/stupid members' etc which is what has been inferred in the last few PMs I have received.
The majority of the time if I know Im super busy I wont open the PM until I have some time, so it sits and waits for a bit until I get a spare few hours, this usually works ok. Every now and again I will open a PM and then have something more pressing that needs doing such as kicking someone in chat and so on and those are the PMs that usually get forgotten.
Most of the PMs I get complaining about this are from members who have given me a day to respond. I should probably make it clear now that for about 95% of PMs I get, youre looking at at least 2 days for a response, unless its super urgent and by urgent I mean mass flaming or trolls posting porn or so on, in which case please title the PM with an 'urgent' or similar.
Even more perplexing is the PMs I receive telling me I dont care because I have taken the issue to the mods and were discussing it and I havent got back witha response. Its very very disheartening to get PMs accusing me of not caring,because I do otherwise a.I wouldnt be here modding and b. I wouldnt stick around when every day I get some lovely abuse.
I said in a thread a little while ago how much work we have to do and we still do,that hasnt changed in the week or so since I posted that. Im also head of chat which means that I get double the amount of PMs I used to get. In the last hour or so I have got 10 PMs, average about 30 a day....you can see my predicament if I ever want a life outside of here!
So what I am trying to say is:
1. I realise that to some people RYL really is your world, I get it,Im not judging, however if I dont reply to your PM in 24 is doesnt mean that your RYL world is going to fall apart, just ignore the issue until I can get to it.
2.Please dont assume that I dont care, trust me I do.
3.If you send me an abusive PM I will send you a scathing response and then I will ignore PMs from you although I will deal with the issues because thats my job.Manners cost you nothing and Im not your slave.
4.If you dont hear back from me in a few day, just rePM me. I would like to think that most people dont think Im a bad mod because I dont reply but if you do then you can send harley a PM.
5. If you track me down on FB (happens a lot) I will be very unhappy and you will know about it. You PM me here, my life outside is separate and I dont appreciate ever getting PMs on FB from random strangers from RYL.
6. Calling me names makes me sad,like it would make you sad.I tend to run away when people do that so its probably counter productive for everyone.
Im going to go answer some PMs now, so if you have messaged me recently yay for you!
I hope this thread makes sense, it made a lot more in my head.Woe!
Liv.
xx
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
Just realised F&CQ doesn't have a hug button. I know a lot of people, myself included, are very grateful for everything you and the mods have done recently, and it's a shame some people have been sending such awful messages.
It doesn't matter where you come from; it matters where you go.
No-one gets remembered for the things they didn't do.
We won't all be here this time next year,
so while you can take a picture of us.
We're definitely going to hell,
but we'll have all the best stories to tell.
Its cool, I know people appreciate us,its always good to know!
Also,pro tip. If you have a chat log email it in to chatmods@recoveryourlife.com itll get dealt with quicker. ALSO COLOUR CODE THE LOGS!!!Cannot stress how much that helps us.
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
Just realised F&CQ doesn't have a hug button. I know a lot of people, myself included, are very grateful for everything you and the mods have done recently, and it's a shame some people have been sending such awful messages.
That's ridiculous, you cant be expected to reply to every pm right away. Just because you don't reply it doesn't mean you don't care. It just means that like you said your busy. It goes for other moderators to. The forum mod team is very limited at the moment so just have some respect and patients people.
I guess for me,its frustrating because if I were a 'normal' member I would report these things to the mods and they would sort it out, but I have no such tool in my possession. On top of being expected to just put up with bad manners because itwould be unprofessional otherwise gets very tiring!x
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
NO ONE should ever get abusive PMs and I'm disgusted that people do this to you.
I truly appreciate the work you and other mods, supporters, community team etc all do. I think people need to remember that this is VOLUNTARY and people taking the time to volunteer are here because they also have problems. It takes a truly wonderful person to give up their time like you guys do.
You all do amazing! RYL wouldn't be the same without the mods! Your work should be appreciated !
Sending big hugs to all the mods!
Love from MEERA xx
“The only way that we can live is if we grow. The only way we can grow is if we change. The only way we can change is if we learn. The only way we can learn is if we are exposed. And the only way that we are exposed is if we throw ourselves into the open.”
What, you mean that you don't spend every waking moment of every day volunteering on (what I imagine can be) an emotionally challenging website with some occasionally abusive members? Like, you have spare time to pee and to eat and to have a life of your own and you don't spend it here? YOU HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE PERSON.
(<3)
Now I'll play your ghost as my ace, whenever I'm led astray.
But I am actually good, can't help it if we're tilted.
I'm in my right place, don't be a downer.
I don't even know who is active as far as mods go. You seem the most active, and that's probably why people write you a lot. Which means you will eventually burn out and retire like others. Don't try to do too much. PMing a mod about should be about something relatively serious and done with basic etiquette. Tracking down on FB should only be done in an emergency. Maybe the ban on discussing problems people have with RYL has driven people to the PM. In any case you are probably getting more work that you should
I try not to do too much but then I stop and get even more PMs :p
I wouldnt say the majority of the PMs I get are anything to do with people angry about mod action. Its mostly people being impatient about waiting for things!x
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
Like dealing with a chat log/post on the boards/name change...all sorts!x
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
I for one echo what I've said before - there are WAY too many name changes here. In my last poll 75% of people changed their usename - many stating because they were "bored". Its bad for forum "brand" and organization to have people switching names all the time. I'll make another thread about that someday!
Last edited by Isoverity : 24-05-2013 at 02:23 AM.
NO ONE should ever get abusive PMs and I'm disgusted that people do this to you.
I truly appreciate the work you and other mods, supporters, community team etc all do. I think people need to remember that this is VOLUNTARY and people taking the time to volunteer are here because they also have problems. It takes a truly wonderful person to give up their time like you guys do.
Big hugs for Liv. :hug::hug::hug:
^ THIS.
'Cause I'll always remember you the same.
Oh eyes like wild flowers within demons of change ♥
