Ok so I need a bit of advice regarding an issue at work. So work is a break from all the crap in my head lately, it‘s time when I don‘t get time to think about all the stuff all the time. However, there was an incident at work the other day that I’m having trouble getting out of my head. I work in a nursing home for the elderly, lots of dementia residents etc. One of the lesser demented residents, and by this I mean he is only confused some of the time, knows right from wrong, hold a reasonable convo etc. recently stripped and got into bed with one of our younger residents, who was also half naked. It looked like he was going to, well you get the picture. Luckily she has short term memory problems so has forgotten the whole incident already. But now with my history I can’t get it out of my head, at the moment I’m off sick with a bad back, but I had a phone call yesterday that it’s obviously being investigated. So now I have to go through written statements, interviews, questions and all that goes with it. How do I get through this without freaking out, it’s stirred up a lot in my head and I can still hear her screaming.
I'm sorry you had to go through that, it sounds like it was quite traumatic for you especially given your past experiences. Are you able to talk to someone at work to get a bit of emotional support? Otherwise do you have a counsellor who you can talk this through with. As I think it is really important that you address what has come up for you.
Other than that perhaps it would be helpful to remind yourself that you are safe and what happened at work is not connected to your past and that it can't hurt you. It might also help to do some grounding, this thread explains how to do it better. It also has some good information on dealing with flashbacks that you might find helpful. Take care
Kat xxx
"Recovery is something that you have to work
on every single day and it's
something that doesn't
get a day off."
It is understandable that it has affected you because of your own experiences. Do you guys "debrief" after incidents at work? If so perhaps you could talk to one of you colleagues about how you are feeling.
'Cause I'll always remember you the same.
Oh eyes like wild flowers within demons of change ♥
Oh Laura, that sounds horrendous. It's completely understandable that it's affected you. I agree with Amy; if you haven't had a debrief yet you should ask for one. Have they formulated any plans for avoiding it happening again?
It doesn't matter where you come from; it matters where you go.
No-one gets remembered for the things they didn't do.
We won't all be here this time next year,
so while you can take a picture of us.
We're definitely going to hell,
but we'll have all the best stories to tell.
Thanks so much for the support guys, it's meant a lot to me. I was really umming and arring about even writing a thread in the first place. So I started back at work yesterday after being off for a week sick. Went through to the lounge and he's not in there. Apparently while I was off there were more incidents of him entering her room so he obviously knew where she was. They decided that they couldn't risk anything more happening and have moved him to another home. So hopefully I won't have to go through interviews like the other people on shift did while I was away. But I will trying the grounding techniques because I'm not doing so well in the "staying safe" department of things. We haven't had a debrief to my knowledge but to be honest my home isn't the best with management so I'm just happy that anything at all has been done about it. I just want to try and forget everything now I think.
I feel better about going to work now, it feels like a safe place again. At home...not so great, I wish I could say otherwise but if I can't be honest in here then what's the point. Harming a lot, thinking too much, and drinking. I'm not normally a drinker, but lately, I don't know.
Laura have you got any support? As it sounds like you could do with some extra support right now. Do you know what's making things worse for you at home lately? We are here to support you
"Recovery is something that you have to work
on every single day and it's
something that doesn't
get a day off."
I don't have any support no, the few people I have told about my harming don't really talk to me anymore. I am in touch with the Samaritans through email and they are helping a bit. And home, home is unhappy. My dad has never been what I'd call a happy person. There's always lots of shouting and bad moods. He would never hurt us physically but the loud gets kinda hard to handle for prolonged periods. I wish I had the money for my own place, I'm 29 and can't afford a place of my own.
