Lately I'm struggling with binging. I'm trying to record my meals but when i binge i just don't bother because i am ashamed. I'm starting to hate thoughts of food, get confused about what is safe or not, and generally I'm starting to hate my body, which i hadn't done for a while.
I've started at uni which usually makes body thoughts more prominent. But also recently I'm just hungry all the time, i can eat a large amount then be hungry again very shortly.
I just feel really, really alone right now.
Thank you for reading
Aimee
Would having a meal plan help at all? Maybe even working through one and planning it with someone else if you're getting confused and distressed by the thought of food. When I'm most fliddy about food, I find it easiest if someone else just takes charge for a bit and tells me what to eat!
Do you find you're able to distinguish between actual hunger and emotional hunger/the urge to binge? Maybe having some healthy snacks like carrots or something would help when you just feel like eating but don't want to feel guilty/ashamed?
Don't have any words of advice at this moment Aimee, but I wanted to let you know that I love you and am here for you anytime. You are beautiful in every way I hope that you can see that again soon, take care lovely xxx <3
Just wanted to leave some cuddles for you Aimee <3 *squishes tight* I don't really have any advice but feeling alone isn't nice, and you're definitely not alone here. Hope things get easier soon xxx
Thank you three, it means a lot to me that you would all take the time to reply to my post <3
Jenna every time I try a meal plan it fails quite early on. I suppose I have to stick with it (I'm doing research on addiction which is helping me to see my own patterns of behaviour, such as relapsing when it could just be a slip up food-wise, for example).
Healthy snacks would be good. I bought some fresh grapes and snowpeas from a farmers market and that was delightful to nom so I might do that. Yes, I can distinguish those hunger types.
I've made an appointment with my doctor tomorrow (is a little proud) so I will bring it up and maybe look into seeing a dietician, or at least my old psychologist again.
Aimee was just going to read and run, but had to stop and say how bloody proud of you I am! Well done on trying the healthy snacks (sounds yummy!) and really well done on making the appointment for tomorrow. I really hope that it goes well <3
When you talk about meal plans 'failing', what do you meal? I wasn't aware you could fail a meal plan! Not following it down to the last letter every day isn't a failure, it's just flexibility. And sometimes you may abandon the meal plan completely and just eat ALL the things, but that still doesn't mean you've failed, just that tomorrow is a clean slate.
Glad you found some delightful snacks!
When you are experiencing emotional hunger/binging urges, have you found things that can help to make you feel better without actually binging? Even if there's nothing that in that instant will help, perhaps some sort of distraction will suffice until the urge eases off slightly (reminding your mind that this was emotional hunger and not actual hunger).
Well done for making the appointment, that's a great step! I hope it goes really well and you can get a referral to someone helpful, as you really do deserve some help and support to get through this :)
Thank you both, again it means the world you'd check in on my pos tand feel proud of me for making the appointment., thank you.
Seeing my doctor went well. She suggested a dietician but at the moment I can't afford it. I might browse around and see if I can find a cheaper one.
I've made an appointment to see my psychologist this Friday. I'm scared about it. When we talk about my eating I feel worse and it all gets to real and I want to die. But I'm heading that way anyway and absolutely hatingmyself, so what can it hurt?
I just, I don't even feel worthy. I don't even know why I post in here anymore, I don't take laxatives any more so my nomming problems don't even feel real. I guess admitting that I should probably get out. Lately I've been thinking about going to back chewing and spitting. I mean, I know that's gross but at least I'm not consuming all the food.
Thanks Jenna, I've been trying to do distractions and sometimes it does work to delay the urge.
Last edited by Snow White. : 26-02-2013 at 07:51 AM.
I'm getting worse, not better, which makes me sad and therefore more prone to binging.
And I've taken laxatives today which i promised after being ill i would never do but i can't stand this.
Ive been struggling with bulimia and it has recently turned into just binging as well. The best of advice i can give you, is in my experience, you have to work on your self esteem and your confidence in yourself before anything is truly going to help. I had tried soo many different meal plans and looked at so many different books to try to help me to stop purging, but in the end, i realized that in order to beat an eating disorder, you have to catch it at the core. Can you try something for me? as cheesy as this is going to sound, and as much as you think its pointless, can you just try to write maybe 8 positive affirmations (do you know what those are?) and post them, or pm them to me. Now, try to say those 8 positive affirmations either looking in the mirror or just read them out loud a couple times a day. It probably sounds like it doesnt work, and youve probably tried it before, but thats whats helped me through it, and i just want you to try it one more time for me okay? Id love to help with what ive gone through and my knowledge on the subject. best of luck my dear xxx
I just want to be okay again
i dont care what i takes
i know itll be hard
but i need to feel safe again
i know itll be worth it
when i finally reach
recovery http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum...e=136338 7134
brokenbutterflies, thank you so much i really really appreciate the time you've taken to share your advice in that reply. you make some good points. I'm seeing my psychologist tomorrow for the first time in a long time so it seems like self esteem is something she can help with.
I could write some affirmations. It feels silly sending them to you or posting them but i can do them.
You guys need a national health service! It sucks that you can't afford to see a dietician! I hope you can find a cheaper one.
I'm sorry you're finding it so hard at the moment and have engaged in laxative behaviours. Did it 'help' or did it just remind you of ALL the reasons not to abuse laxatives?
I think your tomorrow comes sooner than mine, so whenever it occurs, I hope it goes well with your psychologist. I hope you'll be able to be honest and open with her and that she gives you some good advice and support.
Also, I vote you post your positive affirmations here! It wouldn't be silly at all!
I'm the most disgusting person in the world. Why can't i be normal?
I want to eat until i can't feel anything anymore.
Again, again and again.
I'll never get better, maybe i should throw in the towel, i give up.
