I feel like a breakdown is on the horizon. I am supposed to be starting a new job the week after next. On the same day I have to leave student halls (I dropped out of my course and found a job so I can't stay here any longer).
Finding somewhere to live in London is such a nightmare. There are so many people looking to take someone's money and run, there are so many people who have stuck as many beds as it is possible to squash into a room and rent them out to long term tourists, there are so many people who drag you to a viewing only to judge you in less than 10 minutes and decide they don't want to live with you.
If I don't find somewhere within the next week, I'm completely screwed and will have to give up my job before I even start to go back and live with my parents in Birmingham and waste my life satisfying the ever more stringent demands of the self-righteous job centre.
When I was debating leaving my course, I came to terms with leaving all of my friends in the entire world in London to live miles away as a living with parents recluse sponging off the state. I might not sound like I am at peace with the idea right now, but back in December I was. If life intended me to do this, then why did it not have me do it at the end of last year, why did it dangle an amazing job in front of me only to turn around a month later and say "too bad, you can't do it" and laugh at me? It's no comfort to know that I *could* have had a job if I have to quit before I even start. What kind of comfort could possibly be found there?
I stopped self harming and made new friends and put myself out there and put my heart and soul into securing a job in London where I could begin to feel a sense of belonging to the world. Now I feel like I'm trapped in a difficult goodbye and like I'm not meant to belong to the world right now. I don't know what's stopped me from self harming tonight, I guess it's not over yet. If I'm not meant to belong in the world, then what is the point in trying to find a place to fit? I don't know how much longer I can just exist with opportunities being dangled in front of me only to have the ground pulled from beneath me when I'm not expecting it.
I've been in bad places before, I've been on this site for years and people who have been around as long/longer may remember. But I've never felt so deprived of any kind of point in carrying on.
"Zeus did not want man to throw his life away, no matter how much the other evils might torment him, but rather to go on letting himself be tormented anew. To that end, he gives man hope. In truth, it is the most evil of evils because it prolongs man's torment."
where have you been looking for rooms? like, what websites etc?
i might be able to help a bit if you give me an area you would like to be and how much you can afford?
I hate looking for houses here. we found this one three months after we had to leave our old place up in Holloway and spent 3 months on a friends front room floor on an air bed.
spareroom.co.uk is a good website..... I guess you have probably looked there... There are also other 'rent-a-room' websites similar to this.
In my local area we have an organisation who look for people who have a room they want to rent out and then match them up with appropriate people. If you perhaps contact Shelter (housing charity) they may be able to advise you.
Last edited by ChocolateMarvel : 28-01-2013 at 01:56 AM.
Reason: Forgot bits
"Zeus did not want man to throw his life away, no matter how much the other evils might torment him, but rather to go on letting himself be tormented anew. To that end, he gives man hope. In truth, it is the most evil of evils because it prolongs man's torment."
I'm part of off the high street on live journal, and this question gets raised a lot!
Facebook seems to be a winner. Post the area you'd like to live in, £'s you want to spend and take it from there.
Don't your uni have some sort of housing help?
Gumtree has it's hidden gems. It's just a case of sifting through the **** =[i hope you find somewhere soon!
Don't give up just yet, it is hard, and it will stay hard for a little while, but you'll get there. The deadline will be making you feel more anxious about it.
Lemsip, where in Liverpool are you wanting to live? I live in the city centre, so expensive!
"Watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don't believe in magic will never find it."
If staying in London is so important to you, would you mind taking a slightly crappy room for a bit in the interest of getting to stay? That might open up your short term options a bit.
Facebook? You mean asking people I know? I'm already doing that. I have located potential floors but no actual living spaces yet.
Narcissa, I would definitely not mind a crappy room. In fact I found such a room earlier that is only available for February anyway. If no one gets there before me (I have contacted and left message) then that might give me a little bit more breathing space and I'm completely open to it.
"Zeus did not want man to throw his life away, no matter how much the other evils might torment him, but rather to go on letting himself be tormented anew. To that end, he gives man hope. In truth, it is the most evil of evils because it prolongs man's torment."
I think that wherever in the country you are looking to rent, if you're after somewhere that won't require a deposit you're significantly reducing your options!
"Zeus did not want man to throw his life away, no matter how much the other evils might torment him, but rather to go on letting himself be tormented anew. To that end, he gives man hope. In truth, it is the most evil of evils because it prolongs man's torment."
Yeah, you're not going to have much luck without a deposit.
Why do you want to move? Who do you rent from now? Can you transfer the deposit over from where you are now to somewhere new?
I live by the docks in a 2 bedroom flat so I suppose it's a bit more expensive then most places. I got a good deal where I live too, knocked £100 off the rent a month for a L1 postcode!
Yeah, if you say something about wanting to find somewhere and if they know anyone etc, gets passed around quick enough, get people to post on your behalf. Or twitter. Social media sites are amazing for things like that.
"Watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don't believe in magic will never find it."
I'm going to this flatmate event thing. In fact I should have already left for it. I'm going to be as awkward as **** and end up talking to no one... what on earth put in my head that this was a good idea =/
*takes deep breath and runs to event* This is the boldest thing socially speaking that I've done in my life!
"Zeus did not want man to throw his life away, no matter how much the other evils might torment him, but rather to go on letting himself be tormented anew. To that end, he gives man hope. In truth, it is the most evil of evils because it prolongs man's torment."
"Watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don't believe in magic will never find it."
Look about on fb for buy sell swap rent groups in london or areas of london, they often have rooms on my local site. Also some letting agents have rooms for rent listed, have you thought of looking at local council housing or bnd schemes to help'with a deposit, also job centre might help you with a crisis loan.
Mand, South Wales, Full-time working, single mother to 2 scarily independent girls.
I AM A PROUD PLUMERIA SISTER
The event thing went alright! It was in a bar they hired out and I actually spoke to people and didn't feel like an idiot. I was very brave xD I'll be going to bars on regular nights on my own next!
I met a couple of people and exchanged numbers for possibly creating a new flat share (I'm being kicked out on Monday, so not sure how much use it will be but it's always useful to know people), I also met a lovely agent woman who had something affordable that I'm going to view tomorrow evening.
The problem is that this place is Willesden Junction/Harlesden. I have never been there myself but can't say I've heard the greatest things about the area. Though I find most people who say these things about "terrible" areas of London are those who grew up in some leafy suburb type place. I grew up in a less than posh area near Birmingham and have the attitude that most city type places are as safe as you make them and that you need to exercise common sense everywhere. However I equally know that particular streets/estates/areas within certain inner city areas are indeed where people go to die and not knowing the above area I don't know what to think.
It's getting so close to me being kicked out of halls and I really do only have two options and would appreciate thoughts on the best. I can either go and live in this Willesden Junction place for a few months and take things as they come and then if I hate it I'll be in a stronger position to move elsewhere when the lease runs out. The alternative is that I have found a room available just for February in Canada Water which although is a bit dead is a nice area. This would give me an extra few weeks to look for somewhere else- however with the downside that I could well be in this same position this time next month.
Luckily I have some money saved, a really close friend who can't help me living wise but can lend me some money and my parents who said they'd help me out until I get my first wage. So money is not a problem at all it's just having a place. Because I'm getting thrown out on Monday, I don't think I really have time to go through the council?
"Zeus did not want man to throw his life away, no matter how much the other evils might torment him, but rather to go on letting himself be tormented anew. To that end, he gives man hope. In truth, it is the most evil of evils because it prolongs man's torment."
I think Harlesden is actually okish to live, as long as you're not on St Raphael's estate, Stonebridge estate or somewhere like that.
I actually work in Harlesden, so could find out more on the actual area/road if you're interested.
I've found a complete alternative this morning. There's a room with an agency type place which is affordable and in an alright area and I have a viewing tomorrow. No one is viewing this place before me (I'm going at 9:30am) and if I like and can pay then I can move in on Sunday which is perfect.
The two other options are tonight. I don't know whether to go to them anyway and just take whatever comes first or hold out for tomorrow. I think I'd rather go tomorrow and the room be rubbish but bearable because it's an area I feel safe than go tonight and the room be lovely but the area being iffy.
What do people think?
"Zeus did not want man to throw his life away, no matter how much the other evils might torment him, but rather to go on letting himself be tormented anew. To that end, he gives man hope. In truth, it is the most evil of evils because it prolongs man's torment."
