Slipped up! Need Support Please!!!!!

[Melodyx]

I fucked up last night! I've been totally self-harm free for a month, the last time was a burn. However I had not CUT in six months. I've been trying really hard to deal with my emotions properly. I've been talking to people and trying to distract myself but last night I flipped out. My friend died Saturday, and I've been having family problems. It's weird but my boyfriend used to do drugs and when he was high I could talk to him and he was understanding. Now he's clean and ever since he got out of rehab he's really stressed out. He either doesn't care or doesn't know how to help me anymore. I was close to cutting and came to him last night and asked for help. He said "I don't know I'm not a psychiatrist". That was the last straw before I knew it I was in the bathroom cutting. I know he didn't MAKE me do it. I feel like shit for what I did and really ashamed and super DISSAPOINTED in myself, because that was a really long time for me to go without cutting and I fucked it all up.

[PassedExpectations]

you didn't mess it all up! you still have that long time being free, and slipping up does not take any of that away unless you let it. just like in a sports game, when one team scores it doesn't erase all the points the other team has earned.... anyways, it sounds like things really piled up and were super difficult. you've been coping well, but this was still a stretch and your coping skills weren't quite up to the job yet. but you can make them stronger still so that if it happens again you'll be ready.

perhaps your bf is still trying to figure out how to live his life clean and doesn't have the energy at the moment to figure things out for other people... i don't think it is anything that you're doing wrong, or that he doesn't care about you...

[Snow White.]

Wow it sounds like you are having such a difficult time right now, I'm sorry to hear of the death of your friend and family troubles at the moment.

You did so great to go six months without cutting, and slipping up doesn't have to be the end of everything. It just signals that there's a gap in your support tool box that we can work on together to be better prepared for next time.

There's a really good article about it here.. I know it's long but I really recommend you read it.

http://www.recoveryourlife.com/index.php?categoryid=66

Never give up on giving up self-harm, you get better at giving up every time you try.

And we are here if you want to talk xxx