Let's face it, there are too many people in the world.
And the majority of those people are either idiots, annoying, or both.
The gene pool could use a little chlorine.
What we need is some kind of system to thin out the herd of 7 billion human beings in the world.
Now I don't want to go on about eugenics or political or religious beliefs. Those are never fair.
I think if people are going to be thinned out then it has to be for the better of humanity. I'm not saying kill them, let's just stop them breeding so they don't make more like themselves.
I think a good and fair system is; If you have done any of the below then you really shouldn't be allowed to contribute to the gene pool.
If you've called 999/911 for these dumb reasons: (these are genuine reasons some people have called 999 - these calls were published by the emergency services in the newspapers))
- A woman who dialled 999 to ask if paramedics could bring in her washing
- Another caller rang to ask what the temperature was,
- Another wanted a dead pigeon revived.
- Others asked for their children to be collected from pubs
- One wanted his pillows propped up.
- "Please help me find my cat"
1.''The Chinese takeaway I ordered is 45 minutes late. I want you to prosecute the takeaway for ripping me off.''
2. ''My power has gone off. Will my Sarah Lee gateau defrost in the freezer if I keep the door shut and how long would it take?''
3. ''Can one of your officers come around to my house to tell my sons to calm down?''
4. One night during the summer 15 999 calls were made all reporting UFOs in the sky over Cornwall. It turned out the spectacle was lights and lasers from a concert at the Eden Project.
5. ''I can see a really rare bird sitting on top of a telegraph pole who shall I ring?''
6. ''I bought a pair of jeans at a shop last week and took them back but the shop won't give me a refund.''
7. ''There's been a pigeon in my back garden for the past three days it's got a tag on.''
8. ''I have lost my shoplifting ticket I was given when I was arrested last week.''
9. ''Can you put me in touch with whoever deals with noise pollution as there is a builder using an angle grinder outside?''
10. A woman dialled 999 after waking up with her duvet covering her head and panicking.
Also
If you've ever done anything like this, you shouldn't be allowed to breed:
A woman jumped into the bear enclosure at the zoo...and quickly discovered why it was a bad idea.
If anyone has ever thought it was a good idea to enter the enclosure of a
WILD animal they should be left the to the mercy of said animal.
I'm for piercings and tattoos but if you go this far:
Well I doubt you'll get the opportunity to pass on your genes anyway. If you can no longer breath and/or eat unaided because of what you've deliberately disfigured your face, you need help.
If you ever think it's a good idea to do this:
When the bike destroys your reproductive organs it's poetic justice.
Speaks for itself really.
If you've ever decided to perform a little practised or completely unrehearsed stunt, and have a friend film it.
Especially if you say any of the following:
"hey watch this."
"I know what I'm doing, in theory."
"I saw someone else do it."
"It SHOULD work."
"I'm sure it'll work."
"It's easy." (when accompanied by any of the above sentences)
Any of these people:
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CRAcYy7JSYk"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CRAcYy7JSYk[/ame]
Although, those people in the top five seem to have gone and taken away their own ability to reproduce.
The entire cast of Jersy Shore, Geordy Shore, Made in Chelsea, The Only way is Essex and all those other similar shows. Especially most of the people who've been guests on Jeremy Kyle.
Anyone who's ever done anything so dumb it made the front page of FailBlog
Anyone who still writes texts like this, in a world of predictive text, auto correct and spell check on phones:
And Finally! even though this rant could continue for a long time yet:
If you have ever been the reason for those stupid warning labels of products:
On DOG tablets!
None of the above should be allowed to breed. For the good of humanity. Seriously.
The world's population could be cut down by at least 25% and the next generation will be made up of smarter people with more common sense.
