Contains sexual abuse - Nights are the worst... looking for support

[Kittyenna]

Hi,

A number of years ago I was sexually assaulted. Although it was a long time ago its constantly on my mind. Although I'm having counselling at the moment the flashbacks and anxiety attacks are really bad, especially at night. I don't feel like I can talk to anyone around me about it, I feel very isolated. The dark terrifies me and the incident just keeps replaying in my head. I'm trying to use a night light but it doesn't seem to make much difference other than make me feel stupid for feeling so scared...

I feel like I should be able to cope better, I guess what I'm saying is I need some support, I can't do this on my own.

[fergieferg]

Sorry to hear you are struggling I am going thru a very similar thing at the time ! Message me anytime you want to talk :) I am a good listener...well in this case a good reader lol

[Stellata]

It's totally natural to feel scared after what you've been through. Why are you judging yourself so much? Trauma causes certain responses in the body and mind, and this can make it hard to cope for some time afterwards. How's things going in counselling?

[Kittyenna]

Thank you. It just feels like everyone around me expects me to be coping. It makes me feel like I'm just faulty or something. Things are going okay with my counselor, I get on well with her, she's recently suggested talking about what happened, we were unable to before, but I know I need to talk about it, I'm just not sure I can. The thought terrifies me, its just like reliving it over again. The panic attacks get worse and often I end up hurting myself because it gets so overwhelming. I can't even catch a bus because I'm scares he'll be on there and I'll be stuck. I feel so broken.

[hellokittymad]

**hugs** Nat darling, here if you ever ever need me, only a PM away

[Kittyenna]

*hug* thanks Annie, you too, I will now if that's okay