Contains sexual abuse - Vivid thoughts, but not a flashback

[PaleMoon]

Today I had this long, drawn-out thought of me being raped, and cut over and over. It was extremely vivid, like a flashback, and it just wouldn't stop.

The thing is, this particular instance I kept imagining never actually happened to me. I know this for a fact. I know this because I was continually tweaking the details mentally. It was like a daydream, but it was not pleasant at all. It was extremely distressing, but I couldn't make it stop. I wasted hours at work focusing on it. I could focus on other things for a while, but it would always pick up where it left off eventually. These "daydreams" happen every so often.

I'm extremely frustrated with myself, because I have a lot of detailed work to do at my job, and it's interfering. It also just feels pointless. Why am I wasting time focusing on something that never actually happened? Am I just overdramatic and attention-seeking?

I guess my basic question is, does this sound familiar to anyone else? What do you do to help with it?

[Stellata]

Would it help to view it like a dream, and look at it symbolically? For example, have you been through anything that felt like that emotionally?

[Buttons.]

That sounds very difficult, intrusive thoughts and images, particularly violent ones can be really distressing. Do you have access to a counsellor or therapist at all? They might be able to help you unpick why you are experiencing these upsetting images/scenarios. I have heard of this happening to other people before and unpleasant as it is, you are not alone.

[PaleMoon]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stellata

Would it help to view it like a dream, and look at it symbolically? For example, have you been through anything that felt like that emotionally?

The basic emotions are very similar to things I've actually experienced (fear, helplessness, etc.). I guess I'll just stop trying to resist it and see what happens. Thanks for letting me know I'm not alone.