Can't do this anymore

[Dessie11]

I have no idea what is wrong with me. I have had it this week, I can't deal with stress. I have had the worst week possible and now I just can't control my emotions. I wont stop crying hysterically, i needed a distraction and told my boyfriend i was coming over, but he said he has plans. Does he realise how bad i am right now, or is he just uncaring? i just want to die, been thinking about overdosing on Zoloft... anything would be good right now, i just want to be put out of my misery!!

[Artemisia]

He might just have plans lovely. In a normal relationship this wold be OK but because you're ill, it doesn't feel OK. You might have to tell him you're feeling really really bad at the moment and can he come and sit with you for a bit soon when he is free. I know this doesn't seem like much. I'm in a similar way and I'm alone. Partly because I hate admitting to people that I'm not OK as I don't want to depress everyone. Have invitations for nearly every day this week but I'm ill and can't cope so I just have to be alone, or tell someone I'm really unwell and get them to babysit. It sucks.

[Tig]

I'm sorry to hear you are having such a hard time Dessie. Like Artemisia said, he may have been busy and normally this would be OK but right now it doesn't feel OK because of how bad things are for you.

Do you have anybody else who is supportive?

Thinking of you lovely xx

[Dessie11]

I can agree with that. It's just in those moments i don't see clearly at all. I think that absoloutely no body cares, he ended up coming over after I begged and told him how bad things were. He came, and i guess that's all that matters. I just panic when I don't have company, I freak out and when I hear that no one can come, it makes me feel even worse. I just feel as though I am always causing problems that don't need to be problems. I had an argument with my friend last night, because she said something that made me feel uncomfortable, but it's somthing i wouldnt normally get angry at. she made the point i was needing to take my frustrations about my life onto someone and it was her who i was picking on. That was so familiar to me, maybe she was right. I do it to my boyfriend and now i did it to her. I don't know what I can do with myself.

[Heaven20]

*hugs* I don't really have advice that hasn't already been said, but I wanted to comment with giant hugs and if you ever need someone to rant at you can PM me :)

<3