Thought processes can they be changed for the better?

[tsam]

Hello again

This is sort of a follow on subject I made last year on this site.

How easy is it to change one's own thought processes for the better?

Hypnosis is that the answer maybe?

I've listened to audio books and self help books for positivity, but negative thoughts still cloud my mind , which in turn generates negative behavior when around others.

I figured if I can change my thoughts, then maybe my behavior will change ie I will become more outgoing and talkative and actually take chances in life instead of being continuously critical thinking and analysing everything, everyone and every possible outcome of anything I do in life or speak to in life.

I just can't help it, I know I'm doing it, but my mind is locked and I don't seem to want to change, I've been like this since I was about 12, I'm now 40!

I basically shut myself off from social events, socializing in general, talking to people at work, I hate and find it difficult to talk about myself and the things or interests I have and generally I feel I can be my own worst enemy at times and am possibly missing out on some good times.

Life is passing me by....

I can be extremely hard on myself, over analytical of everything all the time, my esteem / confidence is low and I feel drained just by being around people and the feeling of utter loneliness has always played a part in my life, one wrong word to me by a work colleague and that's it confrontation time!

I can be in a room full of people and feel alone, different, the thoughts kick in and then it's time to make for the door and go and hide somewhere.

I know it can be solved, its just where do I start

Maybe I need to download to someone, a counsellor?

I want to move forward, not backward.

What advice can anyone offer if any at all?

Do you feel the same way?

[Aubergine]

Hey.

I too struggle with negative and self-defeating thoughts and behaviours. I had a course of CBT, which looks in depth at how you think and behave, and aims to change things for the better.

I had a really good therapist and we got a lot of work done (I had fortnightly sessions for about a year) and, as a result, I am now much more positive about myself and life. I have to make sure I practice the techniques I was taught, as I'm prone to going back to old thought patterns/behaviours, but if I keep myself in check then life is much improved.

I'm not saying that CBT is for everyone, but for me it worked a treat. :)

[Ailsa]

I'll second Aubergine and say that Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is one of the best things that has ever happened to me. Even without realising it, I managed to change the way I think about things and I know that if I had worked harder at it it would have been even more effective.

Best of luck xxxx

[Tig]

Hey,

I echo what Aubergine and Ailsa said - it is definitely possible to change negative thought processes. It may make time but it can be done.

I am currently doing schema therapy which is quite in-depth psychotherapy but it is centered around the beliefs I hold about myself and the world, and how this effects my thought patterns. By working on these, my thought patterns have changed gradually.

I would definitely suggest seeing if you could see a counsellor. Self help books are great as an addition but it might be beneficial to see somebody who can guide you through actually changing them. x

[PassedExpectations]

fourth the CBT suggestion