Can't even think of a title... please help?

[throwyourpunches]

Okay, so my day has been awful. First I had to present a project in front of my class and I'm STILL agonizing and trying not to hate myself over it.

But also, I went to Wed. church night with my friend like always. And I had little problems with this girl (A) who decided to bring a friend to church with her tonight. Since I was apparently 'talking **** about her', she decided to have her friend (M) stand up for her. And it was a total verbal fight between me and them. I was super angry and just started popping off whatever thoughts and insults came to my head about her. I don't even want to explain it but we were total bitches.

So it's like, several many hours later and I'm still agonizing over it and I had super anxiety and I don't wanna eat and I slipped up and harmed myself and I just really hate myself right now. I keep thinking of all the things I should have said and should have done and I feel like the world hates me. I don't know what to do actually..

[Nargles]

Hey :) First of all I just wanted to say well done for giving the presentation! That was a really brave thing to do given how anxious it makes you. And I know it's easier said that done but try not to replay the argument over in your head. Those girls sound like they're really not worth worrying about. Have you tried doing anything to distract yourself? I find drawing and reading to be helpful when I can't stop thinking about things like this. Also, are you getting any professional support for your anxiety? It might be beneficial to talk these feelings through with someone who can help you learn to deal with them in a more healthy way. I hope things start to get better soon x

[throwyourpunches]

Thank you for your help!
And I'm supposed to be getting a therapist but the list of people the hospital gave me don't take my insurance. :/ We're still looking.

[Laura2.0]

you could call the hospital and ask for a different list?
When I couldn't find anyone on my list I told them and they gave me a different list with more therapists on it.

[throwyourpunches]

Oh, okay! Sounds good(: And I love the horse in your icon/avatar/picture thing. I wub pon pons.<3