Should I quit?

[iShearsy]

Right so I work in a sort of we sell everything shop, except I dont really work there, its work experience through this programme called get ready for work to help me find a job. I didn't want to go in the first place but they basically said if I didnt accept I would have to leave as they hadn't bothered to find me another more suitsable placement so I was in centre for like five weeks, whbich apprently is a big no no.

Well anyway at work what I do is for the first four hours I unload boxes from the cages in the warehouse they are heavy often dirty and more importantly I have to use a knife to open them a very sharp one at that.

I came of my medication not that long ago it wasn't working for me, I also moved in with my mother which meant I needed to be refered to local counsellor. I am quite happy to try other medications and to see another more local therapist but I can't as no such refferal has been made. I am near breaking point. I am suicidal again and coping with life is a real struggle, I'm am fighting really strong urges to self harm everyday.

I have no support whatsoever, I don't want to work there anymore I don't trust myself around the knives but I can't go back of they will chuck me off the course and if that happens my mum will throw me out. I feel stuck, I feel hopeless and like everyone has let me down. My doctor, my therapists, my social worker and my parents. I don't know what to do so if you read all this bravo any advice would be very appreciated.

Oh and happy easter guys :)

[Koriandr]

I don't have any advice right now,

I just wanted to post to let you know that I read your entire post and I'm hoping that someone can give you the advice that you need.

[crazykat]

I would talk to the people on the course and try and explain your situation to them or even try and explain the situation to your mum. As just quitting the job with no back-up plan is not a good idea especially if it is going to result in you having nowhere to live. I don't believe you should stay at where you are if it makes you unhappy but if you do leave you first need to have some sort of back-up plan. As not having a plan can leave us feeling even more unsure of ourselves. Best of luck with everything. Take care
Kat xxx

[PinQ]

Quote:

Originally Posted by crazykat

I would talk to the people on the course and try and explain your situation to them or even try and explain the situation to your mum.

This and also you could try going back to your doctor or a new doctor. And appeal to them for help, explain how your feeling and see if you can get some referrals in place. Although they may take time to come through in my experience it can be slightly better knowing something is happening. Try and be careful at work and if the people who set up the placement won't listen - try talking to the manager of the shop. Some people have a greater understanding of these things than you'd expect. Take care.

[iShearsy]

thank you all for reading and your advice, I went to cornwall to visit some relatives and broke my ankle which has bought me some time away from everything a kind of blessing in disguise! I'm going to have to go back soon and say to them I can't work there anymore and explain the situation and hope for the best. I don't know what to do about the doctors because they were meant to file the referall last year so they must have just forgotten about me and I will have to go on the waiting list again. My mum didnt like me going to therapy anyway she gets really bad cases of paranoia and thought I was talking about her so I guess I'm in this on my own.