Just need to rant to someone. I've just been transferred back to my local psych hospital after being in a locked ward waiting for a bed to come up. They outlined my care plan to me and I just need to rant about it cause it's daunting and feels unfair.
Basically I have to have daily room searches, weekly body searches, am not allowed out for the first 2 weeks at all, will be put in one to one at the slightest sign of anything. My visitors have to be searched and hand bags in and they will be very strict with who and when visits. I'm nit allowed to stay in my room, have to he on the ward during the day and take part in activities to earn merit points which can add up to leave with 2 staff members or an extra baking session (baking is my main coping skill but at the moment I'm only allowed it once a week). They will regularly (maybe daily) check my body for new marks to make sure I don't self harm and any negative behaviour or self harm will result in me losing my merits. I'm not allowed in the (walled) courtyard unless I'm on one to one with staf. Anytime I do go out, even though it will be with 2 staff, I will be searched on return to the ward. And to top it off if I make noises about leaving I will be sectioned.
Seriously. It feels like I'm being treated as a 5 year old and that they'll punish me by stripping me of things if I get upset. It's ridiculous. What's next? The naughty step??? I don't want to be here, I want to go. WHY WON'T YOU LET ME GO???
I've had those exact rules imposed on me too. In fact, one time EVERYTHING in my room was removed, even the sheets from the bed and locked away. I had absolutely nothing except the clothes I was wearing and they searched me too.
I was on a ward where every time we left/entered we were searched. All visitors were searched too and there was a long list of banned items on the door. We had weekly room searches where they went through all of your stuff. I was not allowed out at all for the first month or so, then when I was it was only within the grounds of the hospital with two nurses. I worked up painfully slowly to be allowed to go to a garden centre five minutes away. Even after six months I was not allowed home by myself. I was not allowed any visits in my room either, had to be in an open part of the ward with nurses nearby. All of my post was checked and read before I received it.
So I know exactly how you feel. I know it feels invasive and that you are being treated like a child- but it is all being done to help you. Honestly. If you co-operate it goes much more smoothly. If you don't self harm then you don't get more things taken away. The more you try, the more things you get rewarded with and believe me it feels great when you get trusted with more and more things.
You'll get there.
Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes but when you look back, everything is different…
you once called your brain a hard drive, well say hello to the virus.
I empathize with this and I'm not trying to belittle the stress it must cause but really it just shows how much they care and how much effort they are putting into keeping you safe. I know A LOT of wards & staff wouldn't bother at all regardless of how high the risk clearly is. Try and see it as a positive. Although having said that I do completely understand how frustrating it is not having your stuff/being watched constantly & not having freedom.
That sounds awful. I'm beginning to wonder about Human Rights now....
PM me if you want a PDF copy of the ICD-10or the Mental Health Act 1983/2007. I ALSO HAVE THE DSM-V BOOK and am a pharmacology student.
I have a visual impairment / neurological problems so I need people to type in clear text and no funny fonts. Also excuse any typos, my vision blocks things out.
I have autism and have problems communicating, PMs included.
Just becasue I type well doesn't mean I speak well. I am only part time verbal.
Some hospital rules use to make me laugh so much.
When I was in ip for my ED no one was allowed to sit on the carpeted floor to watch tv unless you sat on a substantially soft pillow. How silly.lol
Just remember, most rules are there for your safety and to promote recovery. The plan is in place so you can learn to cope without your damaging behaviours.
I am surprised to hear that they won't let you speak out and tell them your wishes. That is totally unfair.
PM me if you want a PDF copy of the ICD-10or the Mental Health Act 1983/2007. I ALSO HAVE THE DSM-V BOOK and am a pharmacology student.
I have a visual impairment / neurological problems so I need people to type in clear text and no funny fonts. Also excuse any typos, my vision blocks things out.
I have autism and have problems communicating, PMs included.
Just becasue I type well doesn't mean I speak well. I am only part time verbal.
Some hospital rules use to make me laugh so much.
When I was in ip for my ED no one was allowed to sit on the carpeted floor to watch tv unless you sat on a substantially soft pillow. How silly.lol
Just remember, most rules are there for your safety and to promote recovery. The plan is in place so you can learn to cope without your damaging behaviours.
Yeah when I was an ED inpatient the rules were stupid like this. I'm not even going to begin to list the silly things we had to do or weren't allowed to do. It was ridiculous. It's bad, but the rules were probably one of the main reasons I discharged myself.
It sucks that the rules are like that for you. Do you think they might relax them in a few days if you show them that you don't need them to be so strict?
"Come forth into the light of things, let nature be your teacher." ~William Wordsworth
Of course I'm sane, when trees start talking to me, I don't talk back.
as tough and as harsh as the rules sound there is obviously a reason why they exist. in addition, there is obviously a rationale for why your care team as chosen this particular ward for your treatment, people are not placed on locked wards for no reason. I think it is important that you allow yourself to take a step back for a moment and consider that perhaps this is what others are identifying that you need in order to be safe? Perhaps with that safety and albeit annoyance of being monitored so closely will provide you with the space and opportunity to develop new coping strategies, and begin to talk about what is causing you so much distress.
from someone who has been hospitalised a few times those rules sound pretty standard for any locked unit - unfortunately we can't feel better without doing the work and thus the need to participate in programming. i remember that first time that I went inpatient, I was angry and bitter and I did not want to be there and I thought their rules were stupid and childish as well as the programming, but I wasn't ready to get better at that stage. it wasn't my choice to be there at that time. But the second and third time that I was there, it became my safety haven my place to start developing new skills and more understanding of what was happening for me and why I was behaving the way I was.
I hope that you go with an open mind, you never know what's the worst that could happen?
take good care of yourself.
life isn't about finding yourself, it's about creating yourself.
When I was in the hospital they weren't at all that strict, but they still had rules and took away my things, wouldn't let me out, etc. Its definitely difficult having your rights basically taken away, traumatic even. But remember they are just trying to help you and keep you as safe as they can. Although they may not be going about it exactly the right way :\
I guess I can see the rationale for some of the rules, the thing I have the most trouble with is the weekly body searches. I find them degrading, violating, embarrassing and uncomfortable. To be perfectly Frank I find myself somewhat disasociating to get through them. Also this merit point business is crap. I broke down last night and admitted some really distressing stuff from my past. I was very distressed and upset but not written up for any prn meds. It was 4 am so the nurse didn't want to phone the dr and ask for a verbal order for anything so I just had to ride it out. I ended up banging my head against the wall to cope, thus losing all my 'merits' purely because I was distressed with no way to cope...
I know it's a horrible feeling, but it could be much worse. One of the secure wards I was in we were escorted everywhere by 3 staff members. There was one instance where I saw a guy trip over and the nurse he bumped into sprayed him thinking he was attacking her.
To say I'm completely devoid of morals, would be harsh. Although I would have to admit I find it difficult to give a ****.
I agree that some of the rules in hospitals can be very silly and petty. Like, we couldn't move a beanbag from the quiet room into the lounge room, even though the rooms were right next to each other.
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That sounds awful. I'm beginning to wonder about Human Rights now....
I completely agree with this. I don't know much about human rights, but do we lose all of them when we've been hospitalized?
I don't know what else to say really. I guess all you can do if comply with their rules and do your best to get out as soon as you can. It will be better than resisting and making more trouble for yourself.
I don't know much about human rights, but do we lose all of them when we've been hospitalized?
Not all, no. But people in prison seem to have more rights than detained psychiatric patients.
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I guess all you can do is comply with their rules and do your best to get out as soon as you can. It will be better than resisting and making more trouble for yourself.
Agreed. If you fight 'them' there is no way you can win, and the only person that suffers is you. You don't have to like anybody there or how they do things, you just need to find a way of making it work for you until you get out.
Last edited by Leni : 22-01-2012 at 12:21 PM.
And the illusion of love is the only promise of defence, and even that will crumble.
I will try and research this and Human Rights. Some of these experiences are diabolical. I've been in a secure unit before and the only stupid rule was that they wouldn't let me use pens/pencils without supervision.
PM me if you want a PDF copy of the ICD-10or the Mental Health Act 1983/2007. I ALSO HAVE THE DSM-V BOOK and am a pharmacology student.
I have a visual impairment / neurological problems so I need people to type in clear text and no funny fonts. Also excuse any typos, my vision blocks things out.
I have autism and have problems communicating, PMs included.
Just becasue I type well doesn't mean I speak well. I am only part time verbal.
Pens and pencils can be used to harm yourself, and if you are ill enough to be detained on a secure unit then obviously there is cause for concern and so I think it is warranted that you would be supervised.
(I mean "you" as in people in general, I am not singling you out Steel Maiden)
Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes but when you look back, everything is different…
you once called your brain a hard drive, well say hello to the virus.
I was going to say, some of the rules that they have given the OP I wouldn't see as actually that stupid. They are stripping you of priviledges to a) keep you safe and b) help you realise that behaviours have consequences, and if it takes you having nothing in your room to make you realise that life is worth more than hurting yourself than maybe that's what you need. You are in a secure unit after all - you wouldn't be there if yu didn't need it.
"Keep your heart open to dreams. For as long as there's a dream, there is hope, and as long as there is hope, there is joy in living."
Pens and pencils can be used to harm yourself, and if you are ill enough to be detained on a secure unit then obviously there is cause for concern and so I think it is warranted that you would be supervised.
(I mean "you" as in people in general, I am not singling you out Steel Maiden)
VERY good point. I didn't think deeply enough.
PM me if you want a PDF copy of the ICD-10or the Mental Health Act 1983/2007. I ALSO HAVE THE DSM-V BOOK and am a pharmacology student.
I have a visual impairment / neurological problems so I need people to type in clear text and no funny fonts. Also excuse any typos, my vision blocks things out.
I have autism and have problems communicating, PMs included.
Just becasue I type well doesn't mean I speak well. I am only part time verbal.
