I was referred in April, had an initial assessment and have seen no one fince, except the consultant. I'm massively struggling at the moment. My doctor has contacted the CMHT numerous times, but I have still had no support or involvement from the CMHT. I am at a loss as what to do. I feel actively suicidal and have already taken an OD this year, and still have received no support. What next? Any advice?
'You never know how strong you are, until being strong is your only choice'
Oh that's so rubbish of them! keep on at them, go to your GP to tell them how you're feeling and they can then help you and hopefully contact CMHT again. If you feel really unsafe you can always go to A&E and ask to see the duty psychiatrist cx
Let the Force be with you
I'm not short, I'm space efficient
That's terrible, you have been coping far too long on your own without proper support.
Have you been given diagnosis?
You could visit A&E if you feel particulary desperate, either two people from the crisis team or the duty psych will assess you, they may be able to offer more intensive home treatment whilst they sort the CMHT out.
Its so rubbish I feel completely abandoned by services. The CMHT have said that people can phone in a crisis, but that's not really much help. Apart from the GP - who has been supportive- there's no help. I have a diagnosis of severe depression, EDNOS and possible BPD - but that's not yet confirmed. Is the BPD the reason the CMHT won't help? Because this all my fault? I have an appointment to see a psychologist in a few weeks but they've said there will be a wait for therapy after the assessment. But i need help now. I'm self harming everyday, I'm not eating and taking laxatives/being sick and i feel suicidal. I literally feel at my lowest ebb and can't understand why no one will help me
'You never know how strong you are, until being strong is your only choice'
*hugs* I'm sorry you feel so let down by the services, that sucks.
I can't understand why the CMHT won't see you, it's obvious you are struggling and clearly not coping, I don't see what their problem is.
BPD is a recognised mental health condition and should make no difference, lots of people have this diagnosis and are seen and accepted by the CMHT. Even if you are diagnosed with BPD, how would that be your fault? Of course it wouldn't.
How would you feel about ringing the CMHT yourself, asking to speak to the manager, and telling them exactly how you are feeling? If you don't feel up to doing that, could you write them a sensible letter and post it?
Would you feel able to go to A&E if you started to feel very unsafe?
The best way to get help in this situation is to present at A&E and get the crisis team to visit you until you get therapy. It's really stupid to have to go through this route, but it's the best way... otherwise it's paperwork and messing about. I had to do it when I was discharged from IP, an had no help(!!).
Unfortunately it is often a case of 'Those shout the loudest and kick up a fuss get heard" It's wrong and it shouldn't be like that, but if you gets you the help you so desperately need it maybe worth it.
It's so hard to fight for help when you feel so low though. I have no comprehension of how I can get through the next week - I'm fairly sure I won't. I have kept the depth of what ive been going through from everyone close to me because I am so scared they will be angry at me or leave me and I feel I've let everyone down. No one knows about the OD, self harm or eating apart from best friend. I haven't even told my partner, so people don't realise I'm as low and desperate as I am.
I just don't understand how bad you have to be to get support/have a care coordinator from the CMHT?????
'You never know how strong you are, until being strong is your only choice'
Keep phoning them when you are in crisis. It sounds like you are on a waiting list to see a psychologist for an initial assessment and then you will be on a waiting list for when they are available to see you for your appointments. That happened to me. As I see a psychologist he is my care co-ordinator and I'm not entitled to have a CPN on a regular basis. Like you I can ring CMHT when I'm in crisis.
Of course those close to you won't be angry or leave you. You haven't let anyone down, would you feel the same if you had a physical illness? I imagine they will be very concerned and they will want to do as much as they can to help and support you. None of this is your fault, it's just one of those things. I don't think you should try to get through this without the support of your loved ones, it's too much for you to handle. Even if you saw someone from the CMHT regularly they couldn't replace the support your family and partner can provide.
Do you think you could talk to your partner about how you've been feeling? I'm sure he would much rather you told him, and i'm sure he won't leave you. You need all the support you can get hun.
Do you have anything planned this week? Try to keep yourself busy and distracted.
It just seems crazily hard to get help when you most need it. I literally dont have the energy to fight for help anymore.
I have sort of told my partner over the weekend how bad I feel, but he doesn't really get it. I know I feel worse because my family have gone away for 3 weeks and I feel completely alone and in a really bad place. I am working next week, which is a great distraction, except I feel so low and depressed, some days i dont even make it in. Last week i managed two days, which isn't good
'You never know how strong you are, until being strong is your only choice'
You shouldn't have to 'fight' for help, especially when you are feeling exhausted and at your lowest. Do you think there is any chance your appointment with the psychologist could be brought forward? Maybe your GP could ask for you.
I'm glad you have tried telling your partner how you feel, i'm sure he has listened and taken it in, he might be in shock and not sure how to help you right now, this doesn't mean he is angry or doesn't care, he might not have been expecting it. I'm sure he will be looking out for you. If you felt very unsafe would you be able to tell him?
Even though your family are away, can you phone/email them?
Work is a good distraction, try to fill your evenings too, don't let yourself get too bored.
Is work aware of your problems?
Push will get a person almost anywhere except through a door marked “pull".
You shouldn't have to fight for help, but it really feels that way. I asked for help in April and I just feel I've slowly been getting worse and worse. I know there are waiting lists and a high demand for services, but surely there must be more support/help I can get than I've had?
Don't think appointment can be sooner, have been waiting since May for it.
Work are aware, I went back in August after 5 months off. Pretty sure im not really well enough to be there, but financially I had to go back, and yes it is a good distraction. Thank you for replying, it really means a lot Xx
'You never know how strong you are, until being strong is your only choice'
You can't continue without any support, through whatever means you need to see either the crisis team or get regular appointments set up with someone from the CMHT. I would imagine your GP is the best person to push for this, failing that you or your partner will need to contact the CMHT and explain how distressed you currently are, get nasty if need be. If you still get nowhere you can contact PALS http://www.pals.nhs.uk/ they are very good and can often 'push' where others can't.
If you are feeling down but don't feel like going to A&E you can always ring the Samaritans 08457 90 90 90, it can help to clear your head to a complete stranger.
When are you due to see your GP next? If you aren't well enough to be at work would they give you a sick note? Even just for a week or two to give you some rest and take some stress away.
You're welcome, PM me if you like xx
Push will get a person almost anywhere except through a door marked “pull".
I agree that it seems to be the times when you're least able to "fight" with the system is exactly when you have to fight to get the support that you need. It's backwards and so frustrating, if you were well enough to do battle with the health services, you probably wouldn't need their help.
There are some areas where the CMHTs refuse to have people with BPD on their books, but thankfully that seems to be less often the case that it used to be. I don't know that I have much to add, but I just needed to say that if you do have BPD, it is NOT your "fault". It is a recognised mental health disorder and there will be reasons why you feel and behave the way that you do. Having BPD is not something you can be to blame for and it is nothing you should be ashamed of. And even if you're unlucky enough to live in an area where the CMHTs are reluctant to take on people with personality disorders, you have also been diagnosed with other conditions that they should be offering support for. PALS is a good place to get some advice and support, could your partner also support you, maybe by acting as an advocate if you're struggling to fight your corner with the "gatekeepers" to services? Do you feel that you have a good relationship with your GP?
RBT x
I give myself very good advice
But I very seldom follow it
Could explain the trouble that I'm always in...
I'm a bit confused. As far as I read it they have offered you crisis support and you are on the waiting list to see a psychologist. I don't think PALS can help move you up. How often have you rung them to ask for crisis support? They got me a counsellor to support me while I waited. If you are working somewhere that has an occupational health unit they can offer you support in confidence for the short term quickly. As others have said there is A &E, nhs direct, helplines and mind in the meantime. Hope the wait isn't much longer.
Last edited by startingagain : 17-09-2011 at 09:53 PM.
Starting Again - I've rung them once and had a horrible experience - someone literally told me not sit around moping as that would make me more depressed - which really shattered my confidence in them and contacting them. A crisis line is fine, and probably works for a lot of people but when its taken you all day to pluck up the courage to call and you're told that and they didnt even bother to get your notes, it makes me never want to phone it again.
Im not saying I deserve more help, I just wanted to know what other peoples experiences were and if theyd had similar issues. That's all. And I really appreciate all the replies, thank you.
RBT - thank you for the info on BPD, to be honest I don't know much about it and have found it quite a lot to take in at the moment. I think i would blame myself, even without the BPD label, I guess because most of what I'm going through - not the feelings but my actions - are self inflicted. I just feel so confused right now. Thanks for Pals suggestion also, my GP has been helpful so that helps a bit.
'You never know how strong you are, until being strong is your only choice'
