Can you genuinely be described as "emotionally unstable" when all you feel is apathy?
I know that this is such a daft question so I apologise for that!
Just to summarise; I have depression, had a spell of apparent "wellness" for a couple of months at the beginning of the year before crashing back into depression again around May time. Because of this slip, my GP has written to my psych to try and get my review date moved forward, a copy of which was sent to me the other day.
Now the letter is brief, concice and indeed acurate. However, I have been described as being more "emotionally unstable" over that past couple of months which kind of threw me a little really. Only because frankly, I often feel desensitized and almost void of emotion an some occasions. I almost want to experience some emotional instability rather just than being smothered by apathy; Nothing really makes me happy, nothing really makes me cry, nothing really excites or inspires me. I don't care for old hobbies/interests and just get through the day in some robotic fashon. I exist.
Now here comes the stupid question; does that description of myself fit the criteria for someone who is emotionally unstable?!
Again, I'm sorry for asking such a daft question! But, part of me thinks that my GP may have just got the wrong end of the stick or whatever, but then another part of me thinks that perhaps it's infact me that has grasped the worng end of the stick, you know?
Man, I'm so insecure at times. I will bring it up with my GP, but a opinion on this would be great if anybody has one to share, just incase I've misread or misinterpreted things or whatever.
What you have described here sounds much more like recurrent depression.
However - it very much depends on what your period of "wellness" entailed and the other details that your GP may have. I think therefore it is something you need to discuss with them.
I will say that I have never been given the label of "emotional instability" directly, but hopefully someone who knows a bit more about that label specifically can help. My experiences are more with depression and psychosis.
Roiben x
If the Human brain were so simple that we could understand it, we would be so simple that we wouldn't.
What you have described here sounds much more like recurrent depression.
However - it very much depends on what your period of "wellness" entailed
Hi Roiben, thanks for your reply.
I'm diagnosed with depression NEC (I think), and it bloody well feels like depression too! When I enter a very welcome period of wellness, I feel great. I'm not bouncing off the walls, but I have more energy, I'm motivated, I get out of bed early go out and do all sorts. It's like having my life back for a while.
I think that the term "emotionally unstable" was mean't in more of a descriptive manner (at least I hope so) rather than in diagnostic terms, but I really just don't know where she got that from and what she mean't by it. During all of my recent appointments with her I have just sat calmly and basically recited the same old crap to her, i.e, I'm tired/lack energy, no motivation, disinterested in most things etc. Not once have I cried or expressed anger and she knows that I cope well with most things and hold down a job. Personally, I don't see how that implies that I am having difficulties with regulating my emotions. If anything I dont have any ****ing emotions, I'm like a machine or something.
I am a little bit peeved about this now really, it's nothing that can't be put straight I guess but it's just a little annoying that I'm going to have to wait until the end of next week to talk to her about it, hence the rant on here!
I wonder in this instance if the instability is the shift between your depressive and well states? It may be that this is what your GP is describing, as opposed to your emotional state within your depressed stages. I think it may also be that your GP wants some further exploration into your "wellness" phase to ensure you are not hitting hypomania or anything like that during that phase - especially as you have NEC in your diagnosises to rule out more complicated diagnosis like Bipolar.
Not sure if that makes sense or not (sorry, sleep deprived). As annoying as it is to wait, it is worth asking your GP about it. If you don't want to wait, you can always call the surgery and ask if you can book in a telephone appointment - These tend to be just after the main day appoointments finish, so earlyish evenings in most cases.
Be gentle with yourself.
Roiben x
If the Human brain were so simple that we could understand it, we would be so simple that we wouldn't.
I agree with you that what you describe experiencing for the last few months is depression rather than "emotional instability."
What Roiben says may be the case, depending what your "well" phase was like. Also if self-harming is involved they're more likely to describe it as emotional instability, for some reason.
However, equally likely, is that she doesn't mean anything more specific than that your mood problems have got a lot worse lately. Bear in mind that GP's are so busy they generally write/dictate their letters in one take. She probably didn't stop and ponder the phrase!
I have in the past had similar experiences with medical letters, where I found the implications of certain wording hugely upsetting, and have had this pointed out to me.
There are two things here - emotionally unstable personality disorder which has a number of diagnostic criterias and depression would be different to this.
However, if you were to look at it as it is then I think it could be reasonably accurate. If your emotions were normal that would be one thing but your emotions are unstable you are suffering with depression and apathy and not experiencing emotions isn't normal.
I don't know if that makes sense but by not experiencing emotions your emotions are unstable?
When we lose twenty pounds... we may be losing the twenty best pounds we have! We may be losing the pounds that contain our genius, our humanity, our love and honesty. ~Woody Allen
Is a chocolate muffin loving glitter ball
What you're saying does make sense and certainly helps put things into perspective. I think that I got myself a little wound up about all of this earlier, but have now come to realize that it's not quite the catastrophe I though it was!
I still can't say that emotional instability has been a problem of mine recently, but having said that I recognize the fact that my GP wrote and sent this letter fairly rapidly (saw her last friday and received a copy of the letter via post this tuesday) and therefore may not have quite come out with the right terminology as a result.
Either way, I will definately bring it up with her. She's very approachable and is in fact a fantastic GP on the whole; I'm so lucky. I think that I should possibly learn from this and make more of an effort to tell her how I'm really feeling, I trust her enough to.
Anyway, Roiben; thank you. Take care of yourself, and I hope you get some sleep. Cx
What Roiben says may be the case, depending what your "well" phase was like. Also if self-harming is involved they're more likely to describe it as emotional instability, for some reason.
Yeah I've heard of the emotional instability/self harming connection that they seem to make, but I haven't self harmed for exactly one year to the day. If it weren't for the apathy I'm sure I'd feel quite chuffed!
Quote:
Originally Posted by random.swirls
if you were to look at it as it is then I think it could be reasonably accurate. If your emotions were normal that would be one thing but your emotions are unstable you are suffering with depression and apathy and not experiencing emotions isn't normal.
I don't know if that makes sense but by not experiencing emotions your emotions are unstable?
That does make sense actually. A lot of ****ing sense. I think.
I need to go and interrogate my brain, before I forget who I really am.
