Okay, so this is a bit odd and embarrassing for me to admit (I've never told anyone in real life), but the people here are so helpful (and I won't ever see you guys..heh), so here goes.
Ever since I was little, I've had a wild imagination. I grew up watching lots of cartoons and would often imagine myself acting like cartoon characters--having superpowers, beating bad guys to a pulp, that sorta thing.
It started around the time I was five, and I am currently fifteen years old...and a female, if that matters. As the years progressed, my fantasies got more and more realistic, but they're still exaggerated. For example, now, I don't imagine that I have superpowers, but I imagine that I can just beat the crap out of anyone with my fists.
I've always been an introvert, so I suppose that might be one reason I developed this as a means to entertain myself. However, thinking about it now, I feel as if I am in denial and unhappy with the life I truly live. I literally spend at least 95% of my day living in my fantasy world. Even while I'm in school, I often zone out and start daydreaming. It hasn't affected my grades or anything, since it's been happening since I was a young child and I've always gotten amazing grades without even trying.
I was never really concerned, but I recently started thinking about it and wondering why I choose to live in my fantasy rather than improve myself in real life. In my fantasy, I'm beautiful, popular, and talented at everything. Now in real life, I honestly don't care about being really pretty or popular, but I do feel that I am pretty useless and have no real talents. However, I know I can build talents if I stop living in this fantasy world of mine, but it's just so much better than real life.
Also, in my fantasy world, as I said before, I tend to be beating the crap out of people. I'm wondering if this is the way I cope with my anger? I am known to have a bad temper and I've punch walls and thrown and broken many things because of it, but I've never actually hurt a real person. I've actually hit my mum a couple of times, but she wants to forget it all and never bring it up, and she is completely against me seeking help for any kind of mental problems I may have. Although, she doesn't know about my fantasies...or my social phobia. She doesn't even know about the emotional abuse that has been caused by her and the rest of my family.
Anyway, I guess what I really want to know is whether I should seek help for this obsession. It's really not harming anyone, and it makes me feel better when I can deny the world of pain I live in and pretend that I can just punch anyone who tries to pick on me and still be loved by everyone. Even if I do need help, I probably won't be getting it until I am an adult, because my mum always thinks I exaggerate stuff. She thought I was lying when I told her I was having suicidal thoughts. Anyway, I also have trust issues, because if my own mother doesn't trust me, who the hell will? I mean, this doesn't really seem like a serious problem to me; I've just been more curious about it lately. I envision the person I want to be in my fantasies, but I cannot achieve that goal in real life because I have no motivation whatsoever. And it's the violence in the fantasies that's really getting me thinking about what my mind is actually trying to tell me.
Hopefully I can get this checked out once I turn eighteen, but I need some insight. Do you guys think this is a serious problem or is it something I can just shrug off? I have depression and anxiety that I need to deal with already and this might just add to the problems. Any help is appreciated!
this is something i'd take to a professional. because even if it isn't negatively effecting your life now (though it sounds like it is) it will do so in the future. effect relationships and your ability to live a normal and productive life. this isn't something to shrug off. it will be easier to deal with now than later on.
as for your mom, hopefully the professional can help her understand. and even if she doesn't, they can help you leanr to deal with that. and maybe if your mom starts seeing changes, she'll change her mind?
this is my magical medicine cabinet. Left to right they contain: courage, hope, calmness, and strength.
The magical part: They NEVER run out, so borrow some any time you want.
I have a fantasy world but i don't live in it, I just visit it from time to time. Funny thing is, I'm not even in it, I'm just watching others. People who are better than me and have everything I want to be. My therapist even told me I do this, she said I've learned to live in my own little world cos I find the real world hard to cope with. I guess it started the same way as you, with imagining I was people on tv and stuff. It doesn't really bother me though. When I go to it my eyes roll up and I shake, my mam was forever telling me to stop (she didn't know about the fantasy world though and the doctors said it was a side effect from the meds) but I've learned ot control it now and only do it when no one's looking. I guess it's strange. Oh and by the way I'm female too and 31. I also have like an imaginary sister who is like the sensible side of me and tells me not to do stupid things. I told my therapist about this, she said it wasn't a problem so long as "stacey" actually seemed to be helping me. I don't hear from Stacey much anymore though. I guess I don't need her as much now. So yeah you're not alone. It's not too much of a problem for me at the moment anyway, if I started going there all the time it would be. I agree you should tell your psych if it's a problem for you. Good luck and I'm here if you need someone who can relate. x
this is something i'd take to a professional. because even if it isn't negatively effecting your life now (though it sounds like it is) it will do so in the future. effect relationships and your ability to live a normal and productive life. this isn't something to shrug off. it will be easier to deal with now than later on.
as for your mom, hopefully the professional can help her understand. and even if she doesn't, they can help you leanr to deal with that. and maybe if your mom starts seeing changes, she'll change her mind?
Yeah, my main concern is just that I might not improve on my flaws in real life because I can always just escape into my fantasy world if I ever feel the need, but other than that, it hasn't been negatively affecting. I'd say it's more of the opposite because I tend to feel better after imagining that there are people by my side who are willing to help me and love me for who I am.
i don't think that pretend relationships can be as good as real ones. they may be less painful, but don't provide the same joy either. kind of a "you don't know what you're missing" situation...
this is my magical medicine cabinet. Left to right they contain: courage, hope, calmness, and strength.
The magical part: They NEVER run out, so borrow some any time you want.
I have a fantasy world but i don't live in it, I just visit it from time to time. Funny thing is, I'm not even in it, I'm just watching others. People who are better than me and have everything I want to be. My therapist even told me I do this, she said I've learned to live in my own little world cos I find the real world hard to cope with. I guess it started the same way as you, with imagining I was people on tv and stuff. It doesn't really bother me though. When I go to it my eyes roll up and I shake, my mam was forever telling me to stop (she didn't know about the fantasy world though and the doctors said it was a side effect from the meds) but I've learned ot control it now and only do it when no one's looking. I guess it's strange. Oh and by the way I'm female too and 31. I also have like an imaginary sister who is like the sensible side of me and tells me not to do stupid things. I told my therapist about this, she said it wasn't a problem so long as "stacey" actually seemed to be helping me. I don't hear from Stacey much anymore though. I guess I don't need her as much now. So yeah you're not alone. It's not too much of a problem for me at the moment anyway, if I started going there all the time it would be. I agree you should tell your psych if it's a problem for you. Good luck and I'm here if you need someone who can relate. x
I'm the same way. People in my fantasy world stop me from doing stupid things. Like, when I was having suicidal thoughts and I wanted them to go away, my friends in my imaginary world stopped me from going through with it. It's kind of strange, because I know it's really my own mind telling me these things, but it's still relieving to imagine that people do care and don't think I'm lying or exaggerating. People usually can't tell that I'm in my own little world, because I'm a person who's usually deep in thought anyway, and I don't look any different when I'm in my world. It's just that I tend to live in my world much longer than I live in reality. Thanks for posting this; it makes me feel more at ease since I cannot visit a professional anytime soon.<3
i don't think that pretend relationships can be as good as real ones. they may be less painful, but don't provide the same joy either. kind of a "you don't know what you're missing" situation...
Yes, that is true. I do need to work on my trust issues, though. That's the real reason I don't have any good relationships. No one in my family really listens when I bring up problems, and they don't trust me. After going through this for many years, I feel like no one will really care, since my own family doesn't, so I just don't tell people about my life at all.
I'm glad it helped to hear from someone else who experiences this. I understand how tempting it can be to just stay in your own world all the time. When I'm unwell I feel the same. But now that I'm well, I find it much better to mostly stay in the real world and I get much more out of it than fantasy world. Maybe you could work towards this? My family didn't take my depression too seriously at first either, but now they do. Maybe you oculd get some information online and emial it to them or print it for them? So they could get a better understanding of what you're going through. Do you think the fantasy world would be part of an illness or just a seperate thing? I've never told my psychs about it. I've only told my (ex) therapist about the imaginary friend but not about the other people.
I'm glad it helped to hear from someone else who experiences this. I understand how tempting it can be to just stay in your own world all the time. When I'm unwell I feel the same. But now that I'm well, I find it much better to mostly stay in the real world and I get much more out of it than fantasy world. Maybe you could work towards this? My family didn't take my depression too seriously at first either, but now they do. Maybe you oculd get some information online and emial it to them or print it for them? So they could get a better understanding of what you're going through. Do you think the fantasy world would be part of an illness or just a seperate thing? I've never told my psychs about it. I've only told my (ex) therapist about the imaginary friend but not about the other people.
I've been thinking about emailing some stuff to my mum, but I don't want her to think I'm just self-diagnosing myself (well, I kind of am) and becoming paranoid. As for whether my fantasy world is part of an illness, it depends. Since it is stopping me from living my real life, I suppose it could be. But I don't think it is actually anything serious, other than the fact that I feel the need to vent to people by talking with them but struggle to do so in the real world. If I could just learn to talk and to trust, perhaps this will slowly fade.
If I could just learn to talk and to trust, perhaps this will slowly fade.
I think you've hit the nail on the head right here. It's a hard thing to learn but you can do it, there's no reason why not. I think I'm gonna have a little look up fantasy worlds and see what comes up. Might find something interesting. I'll let you know if I do.
Ok so looking up fantasy world I found a few things about creating them (for games and books) which is certainly not what we need lol. But i did find this interesting link when I searched fantasy world mental illness, you might want to take a look for some reassuarance. http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090116090836AAVRNnG
Wow, that made me feel much better; thanks for posting. I had no idea that many people had fantasy worlds too. :) Mine does seem harmless, but I don't socialize much in real life, so I thought it could be a byproduct of that. I guess what I really need to deal with is my communication issues, and the rest should all be fine after that. You have been such a great help; thank you SO much.<3
Ah no problem at all, I'm glad to be of some help. You've helped me too! At least we know we're not alone now. I guess it could become a problem if you were to depend on the fantasy more thna real life socialising. It's healthy to socialise. Just damn terrifying.
Couldn't have said it better myself. I do have a small group of friends that I socialize with a lot, so I think I'm okay. I guess since it's summer and I've been stuck at home while most of my friends have gone off on vacation, I've been feeling lonlier. It gets better when school starts, but then homework stress comes too, and I have a terrible habit of procrastinating. And I've really been wanting to just leave and go somewhere to relax, but I can't afford to go anywhere even nearby, and my mum is content just staying at home. I don't know how she doesn't get sick of this place; it's almost like being in prison, waking up every morning and doing the same things...I feel like a robot sometimes. I'm trying to force myself to pick up my sketchbook and work on something or to bring out my guitar, which I threw in the closet a long time ago because I was just so sick of everything. Hopefully that will help.
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I visit my fantasy world a lot, mostly when I'm listening to music. Like you said, in there I am pretty, slim, popular etc but in real life I am quite a loner.
I know what you mean about doing the same thing over and over every day, that's why I just stay in bed a lot so as not to bother. I think it would be a great idea to play your guitar or do some sketching. I find I visit mine most when I'm bored.
Wow, so I started working on some drawings yesterday, and I feel better already. It took my mind off of things for a few hours, and I was really happy with the way they turned out.^^ I forgot how much I used to enjoy art; i will definitely be sketching everyday from now on!
I posted a thread about this a little while ago somewhere else, but didn't get much replies.
I have a completely made up life in my mind. I know it's all made up but I like it there so much more than real life.
There I have a brother (Aaron), and his best friend (Matt) who we live with and I have an ex girlfriend (Willow).
My made up life isn't so happy though. I'm not popular there and I live an isolated life. Bad things happened to me there but Aaron helped me through them. I think the 'bad things' in my made up world give me a reason to feel how bad I do in real life.
