Hi,
I'm sorry to post, and I hope this is in the right place, I wasn't sure whether to put it here or GS&A, so feel free to move it if I'm wrong.
Tomorrow I have a couple of appointments to decide where to go with my therapy etc. What my team want me to do is to commit to two days a week of therapy, as in full days back at the day hospital, which scares the hell out of me, but it seems to be the only thing that they think will help.
However, I have recently started a new job, a job which I'm really enjoying and which I know I'm lucky to have, in the current climate, I think that it would be kind of taking the mick to ask for two days a week off, I'd make the hours up, and I am already working more longer days than I'm contracted because of bus times etc, but I feel like it doesn't give a good impression and I don't want to let anyone down, particularly as I'm only just out of uni and because I'm so lucky to be doing a job that I want to do and that I enjoy. I can't afford to get a bad reference because this is the only (paid) experience I have in the field that I want to go into.
Sorry if this isn't very clear, my head is really fuzzy at the moment. Basically, I know that I need help because I can't afford for things to fall apart. I can feel that I am slipping, and when things go wrong it's usually pretty spectacular, and not in a good way, but I also know that I can't afford to walk away from my job or to take liberties because it would put me back to square one, with little relevant experience and no money, which in itself causes me to not cope amazingly well.
What I would like to know is how people balance their treatment (specifically therapy) and living in the real world with responsibilities, a full time job and the like. How did you decide what to prioritise, and how did things work out for you? Any advice would be really greatly appreciated.
Sorry for the essay, and thank you.
"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. Make us all feel wonderful. We'll never forget."
I'm sorry to bump this, but if anyone has any experience of this, I'd be super grateful, I'm really scared about making the wrong decision. Thanks.
"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. Make us all feel wonderful. We'll never forget."
This depends very much on the type of contract you are on. However, employers have a duty of care to you, and you have a right to take time off for appointments that class as medical (under DDA amongst other things)- especially if it will help you in the long term.
Your best bet is to discuss this with your Human Resources department contact and your manager. They can then discuss your options in terms of making up the time. The treatment course will not be considered permanent, so it is worth finding out how long they expect it to last before approaching your work, so that you can give them a rough idea.
Sorry for not being clearer, but my head is a bit fuzzy with cold at the moment - so I will try and come back later with some more information for you.
Roiben x
If the Human brain were so simple that we could understand it, we would be so simple that we wouldn't.
Thank you. It's 18 months of therapy, which just seems like such a long time! I really appreciate your advice, the irony is that my team is placed within HR, so I guess by bringing it up I'm a bit worried that all my immediate colleagues will find out.
I said provisionally yes to the therapy, as I'm not sure if I'm just using work as an excuse to not put the effort in. I don't know, sorry today has been really hard.
Any support or advice would be great. Thank you.
"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. Make us all feel wonderful. We'll never forget."
Could you go temporarily part time, and they get someone on for job share for those other 2 days?
I work 27 hours a week, and work my hours around my treatment [3 hours and a bit each week] so I don't have to make any time up or take appointment time.
It would be great if I could work part time, it really would, but I simply can't afford it. The job is fab, but the wage is not high (public sector) so to cut down the hours would mean not being able to cover my travel, rent, food, bills, overdraft etc (Please, I don't need a lecture about money management, I've worked part time right through uni, but was put on the back foot with stupidly high costs for halls etc). I also know that even if I were to ask my parents for help that money-wise things are tight for them too.
I really appreciate the suggestion, I just feel like what I kind of know I need to do is being made really difficult by general life getting in the way.
Aside from the money thing, I don't want work to think that I don't care or that I'm not dedicated etc, I want to do well.
It just feels like everything is creating a massive decision to be made, and neither choice feels right. Sorry, my head really isn't working right now. Thank you.
"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. Make us all feel wonderful. We'll never forget."
I think the fact that you work for a HR department makes it more important to speak to them now, at the outset. Can you take your manager to one side, or make an appointment to speak to them and voice your concerns - It is clear that you love your job and want to work there, but I think you also know this therapy could be good for you. Work should be able to accomodate you attending the appointments, you do need to discuss it with them though.
Roiben x
If the Human brain were so simple that we could understand it, we would be so simple that we wouldn't.
