:(

Whispered Secret · 24-07-2011, 07:12 PM

Not having a great few days. I'm feeling really down and irritable. I need to go have a bath and wash my hair cos I have work tomorrow, but I really can't be bothered, I don't want to have a bath and I don't want tohave to look at myself, and also have to go to work. I feel so down. I've had a couple of days of taking laxatives and really craving bulimic tendencies. I just want to cry. :(

Pomegranate · 25-07-2011, 02:11 AM

Has anything triggered these last few days? I hope you managed to get sorted for work. What normally helps when you are feeling like this?

dollpart · 25-07-2011, 08:08 PM

*huge, huge hug*

Is there anyone you could talk to? Anything positive you've done and feel good about- even really small things?

Whispered Secret · 25-07-2011, 09:13 PM

Having looked at my planner, I think it just looks like about the time when my mood could start going down for a couple of weeks. I've had almost two months of relative calm mental health wise, so I guess it's just "my time".

Work this morning was a nightmare, but the afternoon was better. I went to the beach at lunch with someone I work with and ended up just asking them to leave and let me be on my own and I then rang my mum; I was so wound up.

I just feel so irritable at the moment and down. But I guess it's just another phase that I have to learn to live through. It's just annoying that I'm home instead of at uni cos at uni I have my GP and he's really good at helping me get through periods like this. But then I suppose I need to learn to stand on my own two feet and not become reliant on those aorund me.

dollpart · 25-07-2011, 09:22 PM

Well done for going to work- it's impressive, even if it feels like something you "should" do.

Is your uni far from your home? Could you register near home temporarily while you wait to go back?

Whispered Secret · 25-07-2011, 10:12 PM

I can register at home, but there's only one doctor who I'd be willing to see and it used to be a three week wait to get a routine appt with him. That and I dunno, I have always felt like my docs at uni have given me more time and have realised the seriousness of what is going on more than the ones at home. I'm reluctant to see them here for mental health stuff and physical stuff I'd have to be pretty sick to see them too. Here they are far more stretched and just don't have the time I need - not their fault I know.

Uni is a three and a half hour drive away unfortunately. But in many ways I'm glad it's that far away because I need the break from the thought of the academic stress!!

Thanks for your support. Appreciate it.