I Think I Have an Addiction To Chat Sex

[symbol5405]

so.....I've been going onto this chatroom thing,

lying about my name

I'm 14, but I say I'm 19...

I have text sex with people...i tell them I don't have a webcam or a mic to do video or voice chat, and I totally lie about my appearance...I just give them what they want.....I even have an e-mail set up that says i'm 19


I think i'm addicted....I don't get any pleasure from it, except mabye the high of doing something that I know is wrong....I tell myself to stop, but I just can't....like I said....I don't get any sexual pleasure frome it, but I still cant stop..

can someone help.......

[Zombie..]

I dont think giving your details out on the forum is a good idea do you ?
try blocking the site ask your parents to block it for you and tell them what has been going on
you are underage and shouldn't be going on that kind of thing

[PassedExpectations]

it sounds like something that could end badly, especially if eventually you do start sending photos or anything, since youre a minor it could be really bad, legally.

can you bite the bullet and cancel your accounts? it'll take a bit to get used to, but you'll be able to manage. especially if you set up something else to do instead..... that would be my way of doing it

[Sleepless123]

Hi.Welcome to RYL [as i see youve only joined recently] and i really hope you find the help and support here it sounds so much from your threads that you really need and deserve.Please know we are here for you and also feel free to private message me anytime if you want to talk more about some of the things that are going on for you/just want to know somebodys there or have a friend to chat chit too even about insignificant things like the weather etc lol!

i think you were very brave to post this.It is a first step so well done.However i also have very grave and serious concerns for you from what you have written.You are very young and vulnerable and you are opening yourself up to all kinds of exploitation here and like the others who have replied to you i also believe this really does have the potential to go very wrong/badly and you could also get others in trouble by lying about your age.

It sounds like you really are on a very dangerous path which needs to be stopped right now and i am glad that you are beginning to recognise this.

i must say i dont think you should be judged for what you are doing or that you are bad in any way etc.However what is happening is very very concerning and i think you are making yourself very vulnerable including on here with some of the details you have posted.

i dont think you are bad but i think you are hurting inside and that you must have been through an awful lot and maybe that has led you to where you are but i think now you really do need help to work through all this before you get hurt more.......and you will get hurt more [as i think deep down you know] if this continues.

Is there any adult in your life that you think you could maybe talk to even a bit about what is going on for you/here and what you are doing?You really need to tell someone.This situation is very serious and it sounds like you cannot get through this alone.You need other to help you keep safe right now.

Also do you have any idea why you think you get a buzz from doing something 'wrong'?Is this a pattern you have had in your life - that you have done other things to get this buzz before or considered doing them for that purpose?

Please know we are here to support you and please keep talking.i am very worried about you and your situation and im sure others will be too.You are doing the right thing by starting to talk about it and i hope at some stage that you will be able to in real life too cos you need help with this and i hope your starting to realise that.

Take care and best wishes for now.

xx

[ASkatersDream...]

I've PMed you on this as I have experience with this stupidly. xxx

[symbol5405]

I de-activated the e-mail account, but the chatroom dosen't have "accounts"...you just type the username you want to use that session.....the issue with getting that site blocked is that I've been using it at school during my study halls.....there's no one at school I can tell...and if I were to say I stumbled upon this site and it needed to be blocked, they would look into it, see which students had been using it...and find me....AAAAHHH

But at least I blocked the e-mail

[Ninja Orange]

Well done.
Try not to go on there anymore.

[symbol5405]

i think its starting up again......................AAAAAAHHHHHH!!!

[PassedExpectations]

then now is the time to start resisting it!

[symbol5405]

Omg.......I'm so stupid.......I did it again....."

[PassedExpectations]

ok... but you'd stopped for a while. resist again. re-rally all your internal drive and external support, and fight back.

[symbol5405]

I was doing so well in my treatment......still, no one other than this site knows about it......since when this started, I was at home, but I have Been in residential treatment since June.....I'm getting close to leaving, and if I tell someone I will just ruin it for myself.....

The weird thing is, the biggest change in my life right now is that my caseworker died on Friday....it was a huge shock, but I don't know how that prompted this to start up again......I know I can resist it, but.......I do and don't want to at the same time.."..".......ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

[Snow White.]

If you don't get any pleasure out of it, then what does it do for you? Finding out what it gives you (rush, distraction, rebellion) may help you to find other behaviors to substitute that need, that are not as damaging to you (and illegal for others).

I'm sorry to hear about your caseworker passing away, my thoughts are with you.

What sort of treatment are you having? It seems like you were able to abstain from this for a while, don't give up you can overcome this.

[symbol5405]

OMG i am so freaking stupid..........i did it again........but worse.......it was a different site, but i did VIDEO CHAT..........we didn't use sound, so it was just text and images, but i did it again...................stupid stupid stupid stupid..........I probably did it with like 20 different guys..........i still don't get pleasure from it, but now that i did it i can't stop...........stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid........AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[CrazyAboutMonkeys]

Can't you try to delete by the other sites that you been using? Try delete the cookies and bookmarks if you have it on that site..

Make sure you won't use it anymore okay? Because it is very dangerous for your own age and doing things by the strangers who did it to you on that site. Trust me, it wasn't easy to use it but you gotta fight back as you can do.

Is there anyone that you could trust with in your life? Maybe, someone will help you deal with this and pretty much everything if not, could you get a new therapist that could help you?

[hellias]

I could tell you that what you're doing is dangerous and naive and I could criticise your actions to the high heavens... but I did exactly the same thing at your age. I didn't realise that I was being coerced into doing these things or even that the men on the other end were paedophiles and while I was lucky and managed to evade anything really horrible, you might not be so fortunate.

You need to stop this before you get really hurt and judging from the tone of your posts on here you already seem to know that you're putting yourself at risk. Is there any way you can get yourself away from the Internet for a while, or go and stay with a relative or a friend where you can't go on these sites or use a webcam? If you can't do that, maybe entrust your laptop or webcam (if it's separate) to a friend for a little bit to give you some time away.

Also, just quickly - please don't think I'm criticising you. I'm not. I'm just worried about your safety. You're stronger than this and you can beat this, I know you can.

You can PM me if you like - I'll be more than happy to have a chat with you. You are not alone.

x

[Cacoethes]

i used to do exactly the same. it started like that anyway, its a slippery slope, trust me.

only thing that can help here really is talking to a psychologist.
you could set up something to block the sites

[symbol5405]

I finally told..........it had gotten really bad......video and text.....and even once i put myself on craigslist.......i'm getting the help i need now........I just feel like everything is falling apart though...........

[Patch.]

What do you feel doing it is giving you that you are not getting in real life? x

[Eccentrics]

Quote:

Originally Posted by symbol5405

I finally told..........it had gotten really bad......video and text.....and even once i put myself on craigslist.......i'm getting the help i need now........I just feel like everything is falling apart though...........

Well done for telling someone, what support are you getting?

*DELETED PERSONAL EXPERIENCE. Op - please see PM.*

I know what you're probably thinking: "This will never happen to me!" Let me tell you: That's what I thought too. You never think it will until it actually does happen, and it completely takes you by surprise.

Please, please get help for this and stop exposing yourself before it gets in to the wrong hands...
Have you heard of cold turkey? It's a downloadable tool that blocks you from websites for a given amount of time - and really hard to break.

You've already taken the first step in admitting that you have a problem, which is a really big step and I'm so proud of you! Next is figuring out why you feel the need to do such things. Do you think maybe it's because you're insecure about yourself? You don't receive enough care and attention? Don't feel bad about these things, it's human nature and can be helped.

- Holly