im so messed up

[debra5992]

i almost gave in tonight.
i feel so alone. i feel like im growing older and i have no one to do it with. i wish i could just to go back to being a little kid and playing with my enormous stuffed animals under my dining room table. i want to go back to feeling the warm embrace of my aunts arm and knowing i was safe. i dont want to even know wat cutting is let alone be doing it. i just wish i wasnt so alone. my best friend is back in my hometown and i only see her on the weekends when im not working which is the majority of it. i wish i had a boyfriend or friends at college so i wouldnt be alone. unsafe by my own thoughts. i find myself constantly sleeping just to pass time. i wish i had some friends to talk to or even some friends on ryl.
and the sad part is im so messed up. i almost gave in and cut tonight all because im feeling alone. but the nights not over yet so i shouldnt be bragging that i didnt give in, cause who knows. but i do know one thing. that i need help. but im too afraid of what people think to ask for it.

[Pi.R^2]

*hugs*
Sorry you're feeling low. And remember, you're never alone- there's always someone, somewhere who you could talk to, and someone else who is thinking of you :)
Can you talk to your best friend via skype? And how long have you been at college? Sometimes it takes a while to make new friends!

Well done for not cutting so far. I hope that you're able to continue that :)

[NeverBetter]

massive hugs just wanna say i read your thread and i care
sorry bit low on words

[debra5992]

thank you for replying(:

[talaiporia]

It's important to let someone know what is going on. They can't help you if you don't tell them. if you're worried about telling them face-to-face perphaps you could try writing a letter?