I'm done. I'm over it. I don't want to try anymore.

[strawberry11]

so i was sitting in class tonight just about in tears because I can't keep up with the material. This was an easy class except these past two weeks have been like torture. I can't focus, at one point it was hard for me to sit still. I can't stand this. i'm not happy I'm not sad but I'm not numb. I don't know how to tell anyone how I feel. I just wish someone would or could understand how I feel, but how is anyone supposed to know how I feel and understand if I can't tell anyone really how I feel. There are just no words for it. I'm just about over this. i can't take it anymore. Medications are not working and never have. Going on about 3 or 4 years with trying medicine and nothing has worked. I'm not sleeping well at all and I finally just passed out last night from about a week of no sleep. I'm done. I'm over it. I don't want to try anymore.

[Laura2.0]

Hi strawberry11 (don't know your real name),
I know the feeling you described and I don't know the words for it either.
When I went to college last year I felt like that a lot, going for a run helped sometimes. Going out with friends (even though I didn't have any close friends) worked very well as a distraction.

[Merc]

Have you been able to tell your doc(s) how you are? Even print off this post if talking seems to difficult, it sums it up quite well.
Have you tried therapy alongside meds? Sometimes, meds just aren't enough on their own.
Can relate to the years of frustration in searching for the right meds. But I am glad i stuck with it because I have finally found a combo that works pretty well.
Is taking a short break from school an option?

[strawberry11]

I haven't really talked to my psychiatrist since I started taking the deplin. However I have considered calling him a few times but at the same time I am thinking in the back of my mind that maybe it will go away, maybe I don't need to call him. Along with that went the thought of well I just started the med so maybe I should just give it some more time. I dunno how much more time I can give it though. Its kinda making things worse not better. I go to my psychologist twice a month or about every two weeks and at one point I was going to him once a week. He doesn't really do much for me though. I took time off of school. It didn't really help. I figured at that point this is not going away any time soon so I might as well just learn to live with it and not let me do what I want to do or try to do that is.

Romperfry- like your picture. Salvador Dali. I was an art major before changing my major to psychology which I want to end up doing art therapy. Help others find other means to communicate when they can't verbally.

Mute.Scream.- Friends do help A LOT I don't have many though. Coming on here and just venting helps a lot too. Sometimes I just wonder if I am being too over board with how I feel so I try to wait and wait and wait. Maybe I shouldn't. Gas as gotten to become so expensive its ridiculous. I don't have means to public transportation from my house so I have to drive. Having money to get to school and work is already really hard so I have kinda had to put my social events on hold for a bit.

Thanks for the replies. I think I might talk to my doctor.

[strawberry11]

I called my doctor he left everything the same and gave me ritalin....I dunno if that is going to fix the issue...after all I feel like he is just trying to cover up the symptoms that were exacerbated by the deplin.