I am going to leave his name out of it but he told me that people over 30 don't cut themselves anymore. That it's only people aged 14 to 28 that do it. I disagree with what he said because it made me feel like an idiot for starting again.
That's incredibly untrue. Many elderly self-injure because they feel alone, and have fears of dying; does he think their pain isn't real? Ultimately, it doesn't matter how old you are. What matters is the state you're in in this moment, and how much you have grown. I think the reason SI is more common in the younger population is because not everyone who SIs does it more than once, also, adults who SI may be less likely to share their experiences with SI because they grew up in a different generation. Both of these factor skew the percentage of the self-injuring population. I hope you are feeling better; you know yourself better than that guy does, don't let his misjudgments make you feel bad or belittled.
"Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, she became a butterfly."
Load of rubbish.
It might be more common in younger people, but self-harm can occur at any age.
There are, it has been said, two types of people in the world. There are those who, when presented with a glass that is exactly half full, say: 'This glass is half full'. And then there are those who say: 'This glass is half empty'.
The world belongs, however, to those who can look at the glass and say: 'What's up with this glass? Excuse me? Excuse me? This is my glass? I don't think so. My glass was full! And it was a bigger glass!
I'm in my early 40s, and, whilst cutting isn't a form of self harm I've used, I actually didn't start self harm until I was 27/28 [at least as far as I'm aware]. So there.
I find that comment re mental age insulting. Whilst I don't have the most emotionally mature psychological make up during times of breakdown, it doesn't mean that I'm less intelligent in general.
Depression and stress are no respecters of age, and self destructive thoughts and sometimes acts that go along forthwith.
What absolute crap! While it is fact that self harm is more prevelant in younger people, any person of any age can self harm.
I'm 29 in 2 weeks and the older I get the worse I self harm so that throws that theory out of the window!........oh ferretmonster if only that could happen on your 29th!!.....I wish.....
GRANT ME THE SERENITY TO ACCEPT THE THINGS I CANNOT CHANGE
THE COURAGE TO CHANGE THE THINGS I CAN
AND THE WISDOM TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE
Wow- that is pretty inaccurate. There's no set age that you have to be to self harm... people of any age can/do. I read a book about SI recently that mentioned an elderly woman in ther 70's I think who has been harming for most of her life (and still does). Definitely not only people 14-28
"God take me, because I hate me" -Underoath
We are male and female. We are artists, athletes, and students. We have depression, PTSD, eating disorders, bipolar disorder, or maybe no diagnosis at all. Some of us were abused, some not. We come from all walks of life and can be any age. We are every race or religion that you can think of. Our common link is this: We are in pain. We self-injure. And we are not freaks.
Self harm isn't necessarily an immature act. It might manifest when one is in a desperate, perhaps regressed state, though. It can even be seen as a primitive defence mechanism gone a bit squiffy.
Drinking and smoking could then, by definition, be classed as an immature, childish thing, heh. [never done either myself.]
Someone who self harms as an adult approaching mid life often [not always, but often] has had a very wounded childhood, and never developed healthy, relational ways of soothing or controlling emotions and distress. Part of them may not have grown up. And it may be this dissonance/splitness within the self that causes self harm.
Oh yeah, and mid life crisis. They're not easy. Like being a teenager only worse! Don't knock it until you've been there!
Plus, living with depression or whatever for so many years, it can get to a person and wear them down more and more.
I'm working at not self harming, and have been free for several months [even though I am going through hell]. It's not easy though. I also wanted to speak in wider sense of what it is like being my age and living with a chronic mental health problem, and stress, and a difficult past.
And even people my age who don't self harm, which ones of those are 'perfectly mature' and have it all together?
It's not all black and white, or simple.
Well, I'm 28 and I've migrated from cuts to bruises. Mainly out of fear of staph infections, however. I wouldn't be surprised if I start again in a few years.
