Roughly 8 months SI free.... *a little triggering*

[whynotsmile]

aaaaand tonight I fell off the wagon....so to speak....and it's funny how once you start you could just keep going forever. My dad dies in October and I managed to not even think about SI....maybe just too distracted by grief to have the time to think about it who knows. But I have a stupid fight with my boyfriend over literally nothing and it's all I can do to make myself feel better. But I can sleep now that I've got it out of my system. Just needed to share I guess...or have a rant. But just wana say that it doesn't make you a failure if you go back to SI again...I think this is something we all battle with for life...Even if you go a day or a week or an hour without doing it you are a survivor. I don't think I'm back to square one. I've just had a lot goin on and have gone with the only coping mechanism I know...I'm working to find new ones and being more self reliant. But I needed this tonight.

[88shelz]

it must feel really awful to have slipped up after 8months a long with a bit of relief perhaps. the important thing is how you deal with it now. talk it over with someone you feel comfortable talking to and deal with the issues safely.

[Retrosimplicity]

I have to say, I found this a really positive attribute. "I don't think I'm back at square one...." is an example. Really, that's a great attitude. I often find myself thinking, "oh crap how stupid I slipped how could I have done this I have to start all over again" and it just makes me more prone to triggers for whatever reason. You're doing great.