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Contains ED - ive finaly seern the light
ive finally seen the light as i have been self harming for about a year i use to self harm every night i finaly decided not to any more i will have control over my depression rather that let it have control over me i know it will be hard and everything reminds me of cutting atm so ill but up most the night on this resisting the urge so i hope i have your support
hese my story i posted on kooth.com
Published: 08 September 2010
Contributor: subarumadgirl (15 Points)
Anorexia and self harm
when I started secondary school I was bullied for years straight, and on top of that when I was 14 my dad sexually abused me.
I was on holiday, and I was drunk at the time, I never told a soul, and we just carried on life as normal. Then September 2009 I went to collage to do a mechanics course and I became very self conscious about my body image and slowly began to decrease what I ate and by December I was seeing my doctor at the time and he said I was fine even thought I was severely under weight.
2nd January it was my dads birthday and I told my mum what happened and she rang the police straight way. I did a video interview a few days later. I was referred to the CAMHS team in my area toward the end of January where I was told I would have to eat.
I burst in to tears, I slowly began to eat, but I had no other way to take out my anger and hate, so I began to self harm. The Friday before fathers day I attempted suicide, and was kept in hospital for four days. Then in August, I attempted suicide again.
Things are getting better though, i've started a fresh, and i'm doing a professional cookery course now. I still self harm, and see a councillor now, I still get the odd remark and I have the best friend ever and if it wasn't for him I may not be here today.
now im not gunna have my day in court because of my mental health but its proved it wasnt me
thanx for reading this
Sarah
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