Lost.

[Marshmallow.]

I was doing so much better just after Christmas and now in the space of a week I appear to have screwed everything up again. I'm back to cutting on a daily basis and for some reason I'm not even trying to distract myself.
I found an old phone from about a year and a half ago, I made the mistake of looking thorugh my old messages. Everything and everyone has changed so much. I'm a completely different person. Everything seemed like a whole lifetime ago. It all seems unreal, like it wasn't me saying those things.
I feel so lost and don't know who I am anymore. I miss the old me and I don't know how to find her again.

[Goldenbird]

*Hugs* I'm sorry you feel so bad right now. I just wanted to say I read what you wrote, and that I care.

[Marshmallow.]

Thank you for that.

[PassedExpectations]

thats rough when you get reminded of how you used to be... but you can use it as a goal or general place to aim for getting back to. i wouldn't look back at the phone though, just remember what you saw on it as proof that you are capable of being happy.

could you make a specific plan of what you're going to do before you go to hurt yourself, just so that you have more time in between the urge and the action where you can calm down and think more clearly..... like you could plan to do a chore, or watch a tv show, take a walk....