feeling bad about hurting yourself once isn't a reason to hurt yourself more. if you do that, it spirals, like you said. right now, you're only a little way down the spiral from where you started, its easier to turn around and go back up now than if you wait till the situation is more dire and you're further down.
you're not dumb. you're having a hard time coping. that doesn't make you dumb at all.
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