Triggering (SI/ED) - I watched some triggering videos..

[ImperfectMe]

on youtube. Stupid, I know... But know I reeeaaally want to purge, and I haven't done in ages. And part of me really wants to fast now, but I know I can't because my mums keeping an eye on what I eat.
But she didn't even notice when my bmi was stupidly low, but she notices now, when it's normal. Someone convince me that recovery IS worth it?
x

[behindblueyes]

Sometimes when I am feeling down I watch videos such as the ones that you watched... to make me feel better I watch ones that are "effects of..." or "anti..." sometimes the bring me back into the reality of my situation.

I am not sure why your mom did not notice when yur bmi was so low, but I am glad that she is taking notice now, even if it is considered normal. Remember that having an eating disorder is not all about your weight, its about the thoughts that go through your head.

Recovery is worth it. Just keep in your head about what your life will be life when it isnt all focused on the eating disorder. Think about all the things you will be able to do without a second thought. It is so hard, no one will deny you that. But it is worth it, your life is worth it.

Take care of yourself
and stay away from those vids! They really do no good anyway.

x Kate

[EyelinerAndCigarettes]

*Holds*

Alice my love, i'm sorry i don’t have the words right now, i really wish i did *hugs*

Recovery is worth it because you deserve better.
You deserve to not have those thoughts in your head, because your such a wonderful person and i love you lots *squishes*

take care

xx <3 helen

[Ami]

Hey hun
try and stay off the videos please?..
Its worth it because you're worth so much more. Theres more to life than purging and weight.
Your mum cares about you and thats why shes watching out for you. We care too and dont want to see you purging again.
Hang in there hun x

[.ghost.]

Recovery is worth is because you deserve to be happy and free and you don't deserve the damage EDs do to your body
I know you might not like your mum keeping an eye on what you eat but she's only doing it because she cares about you and doesn't want you to get ill.

Try and stay away from the videos, and like Kate said, maybe you could watch somer about the reality of EDs, I know there's some by a particular woman (I can't remember her username though sorry) which talk about the damage EDs do and it might help to remind yourself about it.

Take care
xx

[Psiren]

*cuddles*
Try to stay away from those videos, they're horrible I know.
It's a good thing that your mum is noticing now, even if she didn't before. Can you talk to her so she can help and support you when you feel like this?

Recovery is worth it for so many reasons. We used to have a whole thread full of them, I'm sure if you dig you can find it.
But really recovery is worth it because it gives you your life back. You can do so much more when you aren't panicking about food or tired all the time because you haven't eaten.

Take care x

[ImperfectMe]

Thanks everyone *hugs*. I purged today...but I'm gunna try and not let a couple of slip ups get me down.
xxxxx

[surprising mystery]

Recovery is worth it and I totally sympathise with you. I watches some stuff that was 'effects of..' and some 'pro' as well and I cried myself to sleep after half an hour of sobbing to some random person from samaritans. They really do no good, but I know how tempting it is to watch them as well. Take care, look forward not back. xxx