Sounds a lot like mine, only on my really low days I hear a voice of a girl my mind has invented (I think...), she's called Rebecca and she talks to me when I'm bad and appears in my dreams to support me. But other than that I feel low inside constantly, a sinking feeling and continually drained. I sleep so much and I want to cry all the time. My hygene routine goes out of the window and the only reason I get out of bed is because I'll get yelled and screamed at if I don't.
Like two monkies armwrestling on a submarine, wearing only bikinis and wellington boots!
~Phoenix~ is my Little Sister of Awesomeness and Self-Delusion :P Bitter Angel is my Mitten Animad is my Top Trump All Im Living For - Is my beautiful and special daughter who isnt called Kim but will moan if i dont add her :P
On a down day I feel numb and so out of it. My meds are so high that even on good days I can sleep 4 hours in the afternoon and about 8 at night. Bipolar runs my life. Dictates what I can and can't do. My energy levels are low alot of the time too.
It's like someone has put a tarp over my head and nailed it to the ground... it's dark, muggy and smells bad.
Jess have you tried bathing? :p
~Phoenix~ is my Little Sister of Awesomeness and Self-Delusion :P Bitter Angel is my Mitten Animad is my Top Trump All Im Living For - Is my beautiful and special daughter who isnt called Kim but will moan if i dont add her :P
I feel flat. Alone. Unable to get out of bed despited the Radio Alarm Clock constantly chattering and playing music at me, Sleep at least 12 hours at night and take myself into bed in the middle of the day too . I cut just to FEEL something other than low and to have control over one small aspect of my life and to deal with the numbness. I just Feel Wretched and it feels like I'm going to feel Wretched permenatley. Sorry that went on a bit .
I'm still not comfortable in my skin and the anasthetic's slowly wearing thin - Otep
Everyones lost but me! - Indiana Jones
It's okay , they know me here .
Kahlia1981 is my adopted little sister :)
''Courage doesn't always roar , sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow"
I dont really suffer from depression, just feel down but my ED takes over my whole life. Simple things like meals out that I used to take for granted now are huge things. I spend my time thinking of food, exercising and weighing.
Differences...are nothing at all if our aims are identical and our hearts are open. GOF
Albus Dumbledore
Dasher, that reminds me of how I described things to my counsellor a few months ago
Quote:
It’s like I’m standing with my friends and we’re all talking and laughing. But there’s a thick pane of glass between us. I can hear them and I can laugh along with them as though we’re interacting. But in fact, although I can hear them, they can’t hear anything I say. I’m just an empty, laughing, smiling happy face to them.
And then they start to walk away. There’s something more interesting for them and they start to leave. But the glass holds me back so I can’t follow. So I bang on the glass and I scream for their attention because surely they’ll miss me and come back. But they don’t. They didn’t even know I was there to begin with. I bang the glass and scream and cry, and I keep going until I’m completely exhausted. But it’s no use, everyone’s moved on and I’m left on my own. All I can do is wait for when they congregate around my glass wall again and, for a while, I can pretend I’m one of them.
Каждому, каждому в лучшее верится,
Катится, катится голубой вагон!
