I could die.
I wish I could take my knife to my wrists...
I wish I could just cease to exist...
I wish it was all over...
*tear*
I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I'm out of control, and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.
~ Marilyn Monroe
I totally understand how you feel. People would miss you if you were gone, I mean it. I can't name any - I don't know who you know in RL. People would miss you here too.
"A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin'
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin'"
Hey hun,
I am sorry things are so hard for you atm. Has anything triggered you to feel like this? Things won't always feel this bad, they can and will get bettter. Have you got a counsellor or a GP who you could get some extra support from atm? Please don't give up, there is so much more life out there for you to experience. If you give up now you will never get to experience these things. Us here at RYL care about you loads and would miss you as i am sure your friends and family would too. Take care of yourself and if you ever need anything feel free to PM me.
Kat xxx
"Recovery is something that you have to work
on every single day and it's
something that doesn't
get a day off."
Location: Denial Tent, Virtual Psych Ward Campsite, MA, USA
I am currently:
honey i am so sorry i havent been around and havent been able to talk to you
i know something must be going on (partly beacuse things are going on here and things seem to happen in twos to both of us)
but i will pm you and hopefully we can talk
anyway i know that you know this already because you are smart and sooo strong, but this isnt even an option
it wont solve anything
and i will miss you waaaaay too much
and so will your family and your niece and your friends
things may be hard right now and all the darkness seems overwhelming but there is a lot of light even right now
like all those people i mentioned
and like me :) some people say i am the physical imbodiment of all things light and beautiful
i dont know if its true or not, im too modest, but its possible
Thanks all, really, Amaryllis, Rach, Kat, Callie, Romp, Newlife...you're all great, really.
No, Kat, unfortunatly the counseling center I've been going to the past few months and the health center I have been going to are both closed till fall quarter (they're the campus health and counseling center) so I'm kind of stuck...no worries though, really. I can't really do it...I only wish I could. I would love to stop feeling like this...I don't want to feel like I want to die pretty much all the time...I want it all to stop...if God really loved me...he would let it all end...
I know you all know what it's like and I'm sorry for complaining but I'm grateful for the words and the hugs.
Last edited by ~*forever_broken*~ : 29-08-2007 at 03:04 AM.
I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I'm out of control, and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.
~ Marilyn Monroe
Thanks guys.
Please don't worry, really. I shouldn't have said anything...I won't really do anything...I can't do that to everyone, no matter how much I might want to...
No worries, really...
I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I'm out of control, and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.
~ Marilyn Monroe
Location: Denial Tent, Virtual Psych Ward Campsite, MA, USA
I am currently:
know what song just popped into my head? i forget what it's called and who it's by but the lead singer guy in the chorus goes "liaaar...... liiiiar"
i dont know but it's a really good song and it popped into my head when i read your last post up there because silly silly girl it doesn't have be okay instantly like this
i know you are really smart and wicked strong and you will be okay, we all will, but you SHOULD post because if you feel icky you deserve support and you feel icky right now and that's fine it's okay
and we should worry, worrying is okay because when we feel icky it isn't great and you get to have people make a bit of a fuss and that is fine too
so don't feel the need to cover up or anything you can feel icky and we can be supportive and it'll all be super and grand one day
xxxooo
p.s. i think i will try to find out what that song is because it's really quite catchy and now it is stuck in my head
