Yes, I have this problem as well. I don't know if you have the same options, where you live, but I have a person that i see twice a week to help me do these things and make schedules to help me get it organized so that I know what to do each day, at what time. Things like cleaning, food shopping, bathing, laundry, my bills etc. She can also help me get to or go with me to my appointments at the psychiatric hospital, doctor or other important things. I can also talk to her about things that troubles me.
I would suggest that you try looking into if you have something similar where you live. It can be a lot of help. If you don't, I find writing down what needs to be done during the day helpful and put an actual time for when to do it also. That way, I am more likely to get things done.
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I have this problem too. I don't have any practical support but I seem to manage by doing lots when I can. I often let things pile up like washing up and clothes washing and sometimes cleaning too.
Can you apply for home help? Do you have a mental health team, would you be able to see the occupational therapist?
Thanks for tips, guys. I didn't know you could get actually organised help with this stuff!
I don't have a mental health team; I only started actually admitting I have issues and seeking help a little over a year ago and I'm still not very good at actually articulating what I struggle with. Far better at hiding it all away and pretending everything is okay! I'm a little afraid to admit to this issue as work have recently brought me up on... (and this is really embarassing) a personal hygeine issue (apparently people complained that I smell!). They aren't aware of my difficulties with managing day-to-day living and I'd be worried about what would happen if they found out. I also don't want a doctor to decide I'm not fit to work.
I WILL get up the courage to ask for help with this, though. I need to buck up and see my GP, even just to make him aware this is an issue for me. Insanitylives, the looser schedule would sadly, probably be worse for me. I have an unfortunate ability to block out the existence of dirt!
Hmmm... you guys have given me some things to think about, though.
I worry this could happen to me, I get so bogged down in the derealisation at times. UM yeah, asking for help with it would be good and you could make out lists for each day of what you've to do.
Maybe you should try & get an OT (occupational therapist) their pretty good, or even a carer or home help, if your not good when it comes to cooking maybe there is somewhere that can provide meals support, I go to my local Mind group twice a week for dinner to make sure I've eaten at least 2 proper meals every week, get a takeaway at least once every week, that's 3 days meals sorted I go to my mums for Sunday dinner or buy a ready meal roast dinner that's 4 days out of 7 sorted, then on the other 3 days I cook simple foods, like Jacket potato, cheese & beans, or make a simple salad with pre-cooked chicken or ham, or some days I'll just have sandwiches, crisps & other snacks, maybe you should check out these options in your area.
As for the hygene stuff, just shower once a day either in the morning before you get dressed or at night before you go to bed, always carry a deodorant everywhere you go less people will complain you smell as you can mask the smell.
My mum does all my laundry so I can't help much there other than if you know of someone who will do it for you, or a cheap laundrette, my bills are all on direct debit ensuring I get the cheapest rate, they get deducted every fortnight when my money goes in before I can have any chance to spend the money meant for bills.
House work like cleaning or hoovering I'd do after work, but that doesn't need doing every day only once every 3-4 days. Hope that helps to get a simpler routine for you to be able to take better care of yourself, good luck x
Hmmm thanks for the sggestions. I am actually a great cook (ego ego!), but I often forget to eat. Far too often it gets to late evening and suddenly my hands are shaking and I realise I've survived the entire day on coffee.
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As for the hygene stuff, just shower once a day either in the morning before you get dressed or at night before you go to bed
You make it sound so easy! I just about manage to bathe once a week, and only because I have the weekend.
Why do you think you can't take care of yourself? Is it because you don't value yourself enough or because you genuinely forget? If you remember to turn up for work and can do your job it does seem unlikely to be a memory or organisational issue.
Set an alarm on your mobile to tell you to eat as not eating properly will definitely impact on your overall ability. Shop for the week and have it all planned out, especially as you can cook.
I do think you should see your doctor to rule anything out and get on the list for some support after reading your other posts x
Honestly? I have observed that I cannot take care of myself. I love the place I live in, but trying to manage work, personal care and house care just seems to be too much for me to deal with in one go. I don't like feeling dirty, or having dirty clothes, or having a house with so much mess and so little floor space, but the thought of tackling some of these things is just overwhelming. Even when I manage to have a reasonable house- if family are coming over I'll spend a week panicking and trying to get everything right - and then a few days later I'll need to do some dishes - just a normal human amount of housework - and it'll be too much. Then in short order I'm right back where I was again.
I forget a lot of things, a LOT of things. I remember to go to work simply because I have my other half who gets me up with coffee in the morning and ships me off. Also it isn't hard to remember to do something I do for 8 hours a day. But laundry? Putting shoes on before I go out? The conversation I had 5 minutes ago? Gone.
Showering and laundry - high priority because if I don't look together at work then that will cause problems. If I can't be bothered to use soap then at least standing uder a stream of warm water for 5 minutes rinses the worst off. I shower in the evening because it's hard to face getting out of bed even without one extra thing to get through.
Housework - toilet and bathroom sink, kitchen surfaces and sink, dishes - aimed at preventing food poisoning.
Food, I shop for easy to prepare things (though I quite like cooking as well), better a sandwich than nothing at all.
If it really is a forgetting thing, then like startingagain suggested, how about a reminder on your cell phone? Or post it notes in key places?
If your other half ships you out the door in the morning, could they ship you via the shower?
i find my self care drops a lot when my mood is low or my other MH stuff is bad. i find it to be a good indicator to myself that i need to get help. so yeah your definitely not alone!
I struggle with personal hygene like brushing my teeth and having a shower every day my husband has to tell me to do it or ill just leave it a week or so before i will do it
if it wasn't for my husband i wouldn't have clean clothes and eat at all
Do you feel better at any time of the day? I know this may sound bizarre, but i normally feel a little better in myself in evenings (this time of the day is a rarity to me), like i "i made it through the day" type feeling, so i do things in the evenings, including showering & laundry.
I think the key is to have someone to gently nag you into doing things. My bf phones me in the morning to encourage me out of bed and towards work. He also checks I take my meds at night before bed.
Do you have any good friends, or familly who can help encourage and remind you of things like this?
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