Triggering (Sexual Abuse) - seeing him

[jen-x]

I'm really struggling at the moment. I keep seeing HIM everywhere. About 10mins ago he was stood int he corner of my room laughing at me. I want to talk to someone about it, but i dont know how to bring it up. I have an eip worker who would probably be ok with me talking about it but i dont know where to start.

It all came out in hospital earlier this year what he had done to me. And now i have all the memories came flooding backc and i've got noone to talk to about it.

Its not like i can say 'hey, i keep seeing that rapist' in the corner of the rooml, in the street, in the club. I hate that term. I dont like to think that i've been raped.

What is it though? is it a flashback? is it part of the psychosis?

i just dont' know what to do anymore. and i'm still hearing voices, evvn though i'm on mediccation that is supposed to control them. I hear themj callin me names 'fat whore' 'sick bitch' and telling me to kill myself.

please if anybody has any advice?

jen x

[holdxyourxheadxhigh]

I'm so sorry that that happened to you, hun.
You're not alone.
If you EVER need to talk, just PM/IM me.
I hope things get better.
It does take time to heal though. And maybe if you told someone very close that you trusted, and build that support system, it'd be easier.
PM me anytime.

xLeah

[Porcelain Child]

I get this too and mine is hallucinations and voices.. What medication are you on, cos i am on Olanzapine and it helps to dampened them down abit, maybe you need a stronger dose of meds, can you tell your worker about this, it could be a flashback or a hallucination, you need to tell a professional and they can help you with it..

[roiben]

I am sorry to hear you are struggling. It sounds like it must be incredibly frightening for you.

In terms of how to let someone like your EIP know about it, could you show them this post, as it is a very good explanation of how you are feeling and what you are seeing.

You do not need to use the word, especially not if it makes you uncomfortable. Would the word 'attacker' or 'person who did this' be a substitue you would feel more comforable with. That, or if you are talking to someone who knows about what has happened 'him' may be enough to indicate who you mean and help to start the conversation for you.

I hope you are able to discuss also the fact that the voices are still strong for you, and see if there is anything that can be done to help with this.

Be gentle with yourself.

Roiben x

[jen-x]

Thanks for the replies guys. The thing is is i know its not real, but its still really scary. Ii think i;m gonna try talk to someone about it this week,,

jen x

[dreamscollide]

i'm sorta going through the same thing..
good luck and let me know how you get on
x