first part...yesterday was the third year anniversary of my father's death and i managed it well....much better than i have the past 2 years :)
second part....i spoke to my aunt(one who raises my son) in depth a few days ago. she actually acknowlegded that i have a mental illness and said she doesnt blame me anymore. she has explained to my son(for the first time) that i have an illness. she told him it was similar to any physical illness like diabetes and that i have to take meds to help control it. she has been reading alot of NAMI(national association for the mentally ill) material and has finally "accepted" me. we had a great conversation for the first time in years. she told me she loved me. it made me cry good tears :). we spokie of how our conflict is because i am Keith's mother but she has been raising him for so long now that she feels like his mother. i explained to her i feel the same about Kelly's little boy and we realized we had a common ground. i feel like a mother to Kaleb just as she feels like a mother to Keith. that is where the conflict basically is for us. i told her that i respect her decisions for Keith because whether i like it or not she knows him better than i do right now. as painful as that is, its the truth. she and my uncle have been a life saver for my son and i will always be grateful for that.
our conversation ended on a great note and she even helped me through the situation i am currently having with Keith. she helped "boost" me up. she even explained to me that she saw a positive come out of the negative visit because Keith has never seen the "ill" part of me. and now that he has maybe he will be able to accept why he has been raised by them instead of me.
im a little "foggy" right now. im actually having a "flare" of the fibromyalgia which comes with the "fibrofog". im trying to explain the best i can. sorry if its not really clear. bottom line is that i handled yesterday well and my aunt and i have found a common and more loving ground than we've had since Keith has been with her. i just wanted to share some good news :)
~Phoenix~ is my Little Sister of Awesomeness and Self-Delusion :P Bitter Angel is my Mitten Animad is my Top Trump All Im Living For - Is my beautiful and special daughter who isnt called Kim but will moan if i dont add her :P
