Triggering (SI) - I just want...

[~*forever_broken*~]

...to bleed.
Please, if this will trip you up don't read any further...

I don't understand it...what's wrong with me? This is rediculous...I mean, I'm feeling more normal than I have in so many years...so long. But wanting to cut, wanting to bleed...that's nor normal. So why am I feeling it?

....

It's my fault you know...

I let my depression get the upper hand...(I've always been able to live with it, not let it get the best of me... I was what I called a 'functional depressive'...)

I started to cut when I knew it was a bad idea...after fighting it for a long time I gave in...

I dwell on it...

I allow it to get me down...

It's all my fault...

I'm sorry.

[chocostashchick]

honey its NOT your fault and you didnt do anything wrong you have been so strong
please be careful
i think we just have to be brave right now and realise that some of the things we want to and need to do are not safe and not okay and actually not what we need at all
(this is a do-as-i-say-not-as-i-do moment if you couldnt tell)
have you talked to that friend of yours lately? that might be nice
pm me any time sweets

[D-liscious]

*hugs*

not really sure what to say but we all do things we know are wrong and sometimes giving in is the only way we can survive.

i can only tell you about what i know and that is for me SH got me through a really tough time so even when thigs are going well i think about it - i want it - it never leaves, so i do it and everything turns sour, im so sorry you feel like that but please know your not alone

*hugs you again*

take care

Debbie
XXX

[~*forever_broken*~]

Thanks all. Was feeling pretty low I guess...now I'm not sure where I am... Oh well, it's not too bad now really.
Thanks again.