Q: Therapy won't help - will they just leave me to get worse?

[*Beth*]

Hey all :)

I had an assessment with a psychotherapist today to decide whether individual psycho dynamic therapy would work for me.

I have a question i hope some of you may be able to answer, or give experiences.

My psychotherapist made a big point of saying she would only agree to giving therapy if she believed i was ready and willing to really change and that i truly wanted to get better, otherwise it's pointless. I've been left to think this over.

My question is... what happens if i say i'm not sure i want to get better?

Do they discharge me from the services?

I'm scared of the thought of not being strong enough for this, but i'm also terrified of being discharged and left to get worse and, well basically end it all.

So yeah, what happens if they don't think they can help you? Do they just abandon you?

[behindblueyes]

Hey Lizzie =)

I think that the therapists should leave all the decisions up to you. Just the chance that you MIGHT be willing to change is enough for them to give you the chance as well. And you should give yourself and them the chance to help you through all of this. I am almost positive that they will not kick you out, but they will probably make the point that they wont be able to help you to their abilities unless you are also willing to take chances and make changes yourself. But the fact that you show up to your appointments and things will still show them (or sould) that thre is something in you that is willing to make a lifestyle change.

I think you just have to keep thinking about the future you know? Do you really want to live your life going down this same road that you have been on? Or do you want to take the risks and chance ending up happier then you have ever been before? Therapists are there to help you make the decisions, but only you can be the one to make them.

Personally, I think that you are quite the amazing girl that deserves so much more then what you are going through. You have been doing so well in fighting everything and I am so very proud of you for getting to the point that you are at now. I wish you could see that you deserve so much better yourself.

In whatever you decide to do, you know that we are always here for you and have your back through anything and everything.

Take care of yourself <3
x Kate

[Stellata]

I would say that it's difficult to say either way at the beginning of/before therapy.
Yes, psychdynamic therapy is, like any therapy, hard work.
But a counselling psychologist I saw for a whole once said to me that therapy may help me, it may not. Well, it is helping. I've grown so much since I began decent psychdynamic therapy.
I see a private therapist, and always have done, so things are slightly different for me...When I started working with her she warned me that it would be/is a long process, and that I needed to be prepared for that.

You could tell her that you feel you want to, but also change is really scary, and that you are frightened of being abandoned and left to get more ill.
I would say that that is plenty of material for a good psychodynamic therapist to work with with you. It tells me such a lot about you as a person, your hopes, your fears, how you feel about relationships...
Therapy is a journey, and, although it's helpful to have goals, the journey is what it is, and is very precious for that.

I assume it's fairly short term therapy? Which is hard in many ways, because it takes time to develop at your own pace, with the stops and starts and discoveries and learning and assimulating that is all a part of it.

What do you want out of therapy? What do you expect of your therapist?

[Horizon]

A few years ago my therapist told my parents that I dind't want to get better, and she said there was no point in her seeing me until I wanted to get better. So yeah, she kicked me out...then a year later I asked to see her, and it was a good decision on both our parts.