scars and medical professionals - a question for parents who SI

toooldforthis · 05-07-2010, 02:52 PM

Hi All

I was an RYL member back in about 2002. I can't remember how I spelled my username, let alone what the password was.

I've just SI-ed for the first time in ten years. I did it a week ago and I still can't believe it.

I'm worried about the sight of the scars because I'm constantly in and out of hospital with various medical issues (maybe I'll post about them on the ED board, though I'm not sure such scare tactics really help) and am always examined. Aside from really not wanting SI on my medical records, I now have a baby who I love more than anyone else on earth, and I'm scared of being investigated as a potentially unfit/abusive mother. Terrified of Social Services.

My GP made me promise to her that I'd seek help if I wasn't coping, but everything got on top of me so quickly, and by the time I realised how I felt I'd already SI-ed. So now I'm terrified that I won't be believed or trusted for anything with my baby either.

Have any other parents been in this position?

Margo · 05-07-2010, 03:30 PM

Id tell your doc what you have written here. 10 Years is amazing! Im sure in those 10 years there have been many trying times but you didnt return to the blade.

So you have slipped. It happens. Tell the doc this. Express your concerns for how you will be perceived. You know the kids at risk from their parents are the ones whos parents deny there is anything wrong or to worry about. these feelings prove you put your child first.

You are a mum but you are a human too. No mums are perfect.

Oh and dont just get help for your baby but get help for you too. she can be your focus but you also gotta want to do it for you too!

*gives you a plaster with a cup cake on it*

Matthew

toooldforthis · 05-07-2010, 03:45 PM

*licks icing off cup cake on plaster*

Thanks. I think that's the right way to emphasise it.

Maybe I'm totally disconnected from everything, though, but I don't feel as though I need their *help*. I don't think I'm depressed. But then, I don't really understand why it happened.

hycan · 06-07-2010, 12:30 AM

Also honey if you are in and out of hospital for ED reasons, self harm isn't going to shock anyone! But I think the best option is to be open and honest with everyone involved in your care. Social workers don't have a good rep but they really don't take children away unless they have to, usually abuse/drugs. Do you have trusted people who could take of your baby and have it set up just incase? Not saying you shouldn't have her, but aside from mental health problems if you are in and out of hospital you need to have a back-up plan for child care, to be fair this is just good sense for anyone!