Triggering (SI/OD) - no replies needed.

[k26]

was meant to be going out with some people from my college tonight, wasnt looking forward to it but thought it would be good to go out and act normal.

they cancelled.
now...im falling apart. because i dont have to be 'fine'
i cant do this.

i want to hurt myself.
i want to do something stupid.
i cant do this, i cant do this, i cant do this, i cant do this, i cant do this.

i want to bleed. to see it, feel the pain.
*sigh* but that dosent seem bad enough.
i dont want to wake up tomorrow.

iv been trying to be okay so that i could manage tonight, i dont cope well in public places when i feel down. so..iv prepared myself to be 'normal'
but now...i dont have to be okay. i can melt and i want to do something.

ahhh switch my god damn stupid brain off!!
make it stop.
iv had enough, i cant do this, im fed up, it hurts too much and i cant cope. cant.

[[Fog]]

You CAN do this.

*Hugs*

[k26]

i dont think i can.
this is the feeling iv had in the past, before i do something stupid.
and i cant stop it.
i dont want to.

[DontLookUp]

I know you dont want to, but you have to. You've had this feeling before, but you've made it through it, your still here. things do get better, you have to remember that and believe that you will be ok. Try and stay distracted as much as you can and be around someone else even if you dont feel you can pretend in front of them xxx

[Katiee]

You can get through this, hun. *hugs*
I'm here if you wanna talk. xx

[Imperfect.Star]

Can you try to do something with someone else tonight? Doesn't have to be a big night out, just get someone to hang out with you so that you still have a reason to hold yourself together? Also so that you're safe.
Sorry, not full of useful words right now
xxxx