Feeling unreal and a bit unsafe..

[shadowdancer]

Hello..

I just wanted to run this by you guys cause theres surely someone here who's had this happen to them..

Three days ago I was, as far as it can be said, alright. Then I went to bed and for some reason after about half an hour this thought just came into my head that the world isn't real.. That it's all just some big illusion created by somebody who enjoys controlling people.

Like 'The Matrix', if you will.

And as soon as I thought that it was like the veil was lifted from before my eyes and I saw that this is all fake.. everything was clear. Now I can understand how the universe can be so unimaginably big.. how everything came into being.. etc etc.. because somebody just plugged in a computer and WHAM. "Life".

It's.. well.. terrifying me really. I haven't stopped feeling sick since. But it's also quite exciting. What if I do something really unlike me and therefore not programmed? Agh..

I don't know wether to tell my case manager.. I'm supposed to be seeing a psychaiatrist in three weeks so they can discharge me from their service (Early Intervention [Psychosis]) .. I don't want to be shoved on another antipsychotic..

I just don't know..

[akita]

You should tell your case manager.

[blind at heart]

u can't do something not programmed
we are all autonomous (spelling? idk)

[tamobhuuta]

i think you should tell them, just in case you're wrong about the world. they might not put you on another med, they might offer you something else. and unless you're on a section they can't force new meds on you, so you would haev the choice of asking for something else.

[shadowdancer]

I was about to text my case manager when I realised that if they say it's something diagnosable and prescribe meds or therapy or whatever I'll have to tell the DVLA.. and then they'll probably take my driving license off me.. and without that I can't work cause my job is 90% driving.. oh god..

I really don't know what to do. I wish I had someone here to talk to.

[marmaladeisnice]

Hey
I haven't really got the same issue as you, but you sound really lost and so I just thought I'd say you are more than welcome to message me. I am happy to listen and hopefully at least reassure you :)

Take care