I'm not going to say it's 'normal', as such, but I think it is common for self-harmers. It's become a big part of your life, and sometimes it's a 'natural' reaction to look at things like that and think about hurting yourself.
The urges do get less strong over time - and remember that even if that urge comes back later and you can't fight it, you did fight it before; and again, over time the length of time you can fight for can become longer, and the longer you can hold off from doing it, the better. Have you ever tried to '15 minute' technique to try and help with that? You try to distract yourself just for 15 minutes from hurting yourself (or if you feel you can manage that, try for a bit longer), and then when you're reached that time, try for another 15 minutes, etc.
It honestly does get easier in time. xx
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