Triggering (SI/ED) - Spring break?

Scarletdreamer · 06-03-2010, 02:17 AM

Sooo... my spring break starts this weekend and goes through next Sunday. Thank God, I needed this break from uni, as it's slowly killing me... but I need ideas for what to do during it. I struggle a lot with SI/ED stuff, as a lot of you know already, and I don't want to give in to those urges. I want to prove that I am stronger than they are.

I don't know if I will be successful. Especially SI, because the blades are RIGHT THERE. (I know, "get rid of the blades," but I don't want to... no good reason not to, though, as I am kind of unofficially aiming to be SI-free this whole year)

I feel ambivalent about this break, actually... I mean, I know that I need it to get caught up on work, but I'm also scared that my work will trigger me - I have to write my senior seminar outline/paper, and it's on suicidal ideation & coping mechanisms. And I'm already passively suicidal, have been for awhile... :-S

ED-wise, it's bingeing/purging for which I am currently fighting the urges... have had mini-binges but nothing major, and haven't purged.

I don't have a really big support network, and my best friend's boyfriend is coming up for about a week, so yeah, I doubt I will see her much. :-/

My husband will be working & I don't want to spend all of the time with my parents. I also don't want my husband to take the week off, either vacation or FMLA...

...so, with all of that verbal vomit, what ideas can you come up with that will keep me busy? :-S

(sorry if this is a pointless post :( ...)

HopeRises · 06-03-2010, 03:32 AM

How about making a 'plan'? I have to kind of 'do the opposite' When it's school holidays I'm busy (people are around..mum is a teacher) so I make plans to get through the weeks that aren't school holiday times.

How about planning things that get you out of the house,

*shopping, Even if it's just going to the supermarket to buy a magazine.
For me thats a journey,Bus there, bus back. I plan it all out (which takes up time too)

*spring cleaning

*baking (this also gives you an excuse to go to the supermarket to get ingredients) It doesn't have to be cakes and stuff how about finding a different recipie (there are TONNS on the internet) for a dinner or lunch you might like to have? or cook a meal for your husband? try you hand at something new.

*writing, Ok you have your paper to do, but you can do journalling, creative writting, poetry

*watch a film you haven't seen in awhile

*meet up with friends, You say you probably won't see your Best mate but maybe you could plan to go for coffee with her on one of the days? Maybe even her boyfriend could come (don't know if you guys are friends or not) but if you ask her in advance then maybe she'd be more open to it.

*have a look at 'whats on' in your community..in my local newspaper they tell you about exhibitions and things that are taking part during the week..maybe you can find something that interests you.

What kind of things are you interested it/do you like doing?

I'd say, make plans, make it busy though give yourself time for work during the week too. What I found helped me to study was to do a little bit, then do something i liked for abit, then do some more studying. Ok it takes a little longer..but it was getting done.

Good luck with Spring break and remember RYL is here aswell.

Scarletdreamer · 08-03-2010, 01:40 PM

Thanks Leigh, for the ideas... and sorry for not responding to them sooner. Those are all good ideas... I am a journaler - fanatic really, lol - so that will be a good thing to do, as I have an InsaneJournal that I haven't used for awhile (use it for analyzing quotes and pondering the meaning of life, lol) and a LJ that I use just for venting and writing about "normal journally things" - as well as a paper journal that I heart. Hehe.

Uhm, shopping is good except I have no money... heh... so yeah. Will have to figure out a way around that... maybe can finagle a bit. We shall see.

I do enjoy reading and am going to take time to read... but when I REALLY want to cut/purge I can't focus. So I guess that's when I either leave the apartment or journal the feelings out?

*sigh*

At least my best friend is available to hang out... :) That should be good...