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It's all piling up... and I need a song. *mentions SI*
I'm moving soon. I'm leaving China which is good because I've been really unhappy here. And I've found what looks like a great job in Vietnam. And the last couple of weeks have been great because I've been so focused on preparing for the move and so happy at the prospect of leaving that I've just felt much more in control and less triggered. I've had paperwork to sort out and I've had to find someone to rent my apartment and I've had to have exit interviews at work and it's mostly gone smoothly and been okay.
But suddenly I have to move out early and camp at my friend's place for 2 weeks and my visa paperwork is going to be late and my passport has to be submitted to the Chinese PSB AND the Vietnamese embassy to get my visas sorted and I have to find a way to ship things back to UK and I need to change some of my money and wire the rest and I don't know how to do any of it. I have to buy clothes and I can't find a place that sells English language guide books and I don't know if I need any vaccinations and I haven't packed yet. I need to get a police check but I can't do it myself cos my Chinese isn't good enough and I don't know who can help me. I need to cancel my internet and go to the bank.
I'm going to stop there or it'll just sound like a 'to do' list.
I feel like I'm drowning. I haven't slept or eaten properly for days. I'm still working full time and there just aren't enough hours in the day. At the back of my mind, I'm sure it'll all be okay, but that doesn't seem to be enough. I managed to go 2 weeks without cutting which was a record and I was so psyched and convinced it was all thanks to having this new job. Then last night I just fell apart and ruined it all and I was so angry with myself! I HAVE to stay in control but I'm really struggling.
Anyway, this is getting too long. The last bit... some of my Chinese friends want to have goodbye celebrations and these will involve me buying them dinner and them taking me to karaoke. I hate karaoke - I can't sing at all, especially when everyone's listening. But this is one occasion where I won't be able to get out of it. So I need to find an easy song and practise it at home. Suggestions?
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