Triggering (SI/Suicide) - I see no options

[Wannabfree]

Im not sure who to talk to or what to do with myself so i thought i would ask you all for some advice. I am constantly suicidal and feeling bad (in varying degresss throughout the day). Two weeks ago i cut my wrist with the intention of killing myself and got admitted to the hospital for a couple of nights. I have a case manager whom i have seen twice since then. I feel like i have no support, no options left at all. i wreck everyones life, especially my kids. I hate who i am. I am just existing, feeling like a robot on auto pilot. I dont know what to do....everyone is frustrated with me and im tired of pretending that im ok when inside i feel so empty, sad and alone. I dont think i can do this anymore. I have to fight to get help and i just feel frustrated and unheard. I think im so bad that i need to be hurt or hated. Sorry for saying all this :(

[Wannabfree]

THere are NO, absolutely NO OPTIONS left for me now...im stupid, im dead, i cant take it anymore :(

[jonikd]

there's always options hun. I know how you feel, I'm assuming you're also a bit older and there's little understanding or acceptance of these feelings from the 'real world' once you're an "adult"

Your kids need you, get yourself some help, talk to your doctor or someone. Keep existing for now OK? Things will change, we all have to believe that.

I'm pretty messed up tonight too so not much help probably. But I hear you and I feel what you're saying and I've been there.

Joanie
x

*hugs* things can get better. could you go back to the hospital? you can also call your case manager and let them know you're having such a hard time.

[crazykat]

*Hugs* Hold on there hun, there are always options even when it seems like we have none left. I can imagine it must be hard seeing a new case manager which is maybe why you feel like you have no support as you find it hard opening up to them. That will get easier over time though. Please try and let them know how much you are struggling through. If for nothing else fight for your kids. You will get through this hun. Take care
Kat xxx

[Wannabfree]

Im trying to tell them how bad im feeling the last few days but they say '''just hold out till monday''....what if i cant hold out till then...im thinking about suicide all the time :(

[crazykat]

Can you try and explain this to them. Also if find that you are feeling really unsafe can you go down to your local A&E. I know it's hard but you will get through this. Take care
Kat xx

[Wannabfree]

thanks for your support Kat...i appreciate it. i told my counsellor how im feeling and she said ''we have to focus on the positives and the future''. She shuts me down if i talk about suicide or anything. So i dont feel like she wants to hear it. i have a review with the psych doctor from the hospital on monday so will try and tell him and see where i get. I am so frustrated as i need help and it seems so hard to find.

[crazykat]

I am sorry your got that response from your counsellor it must have been frustating. Hopefully it goes better with the pysch. Take care
Kat xxx