Triggering (SI) - black hole "rantish maybe"

[silentgirl]

I am scared. To write whats going through my head and emotions, to even think about the last few months or to even think about facing my problems in counselling. I don’t know if im strong enough to admit that im struggling even though the issues seem so small compared to other people’s issues. Or am i just in denial for the fact that ive gone 14 months without self harm and now i cant stop thinking about it nor being able to face my past/recent issues that are in my life at the moment? Everyone says that i am strong but i don’t feel strong. I feel weak for even the day that i couldn’t cope nearly five years ago now and started self harming. I even thought the reasons why i started were small and pathetic. I feel that i cant face things, that i just run the other way instead....
I feel that i have to hide how i am feeling and put on a smile so i don’t hurt my family
I feel that because i was 14 months free and now out of high school that my depression and cutting should be gone, healed by now.
I feel that i cant talk about whats going on without being judged and i feel that my problems aren’t big enough to talk about or need counselling for.
Sorry, pathetic post.

[flinchybird]

not pathic . i love you and i'm here. u are strong

[rachiie]

thats not pathetic
i can realate to that
Ive been over a year self harm free until the past 2 weeks
it sucks to go backwards
but people have told me that relaps is apart of recovery
pm me if you would like to talk
Rach x x

[FoggyReality]

Don't think of your problems as big or small, or compare them to others. I do that all the time and it holds me back from letting things out, which in turn end up making me SI. I also know the feeling of not feeling strong enough to face issues. My counselor brought up some issues from when I was 14 and for three weeks they have been haunting me and I just don't know how I am going to over come. But we will...we are strong people, and you def have support here. If you wanna PM me anytime, please do! You are def not alone!!! <3

[Defender Of The Faith]

I was two years free till a few months back. I guess for me, it never really went away. It was always there... I just... Managed to ignore it... And I know it's scary, but when you can talk to people about it, and get the help you need, it does get better. It gets... It gets a little easier... Not much, but... Enough for you to be able to carry on... And then... I guess eventually it will go away... Maybe not forever, but... At least the next time, you'll know you can handle it!
Take care
xx

[evfreak42]

-hugs- I know how you feel. I have always felt like I was weak for cutting when so many people probably had it worse than me. I feel bad for having relapsed in college because I thought I had left all that behind. I was hesitant to find help...but one day I just decided that I was gonna call for a counselor. I did, and it actually felt pretty good to talk to someone. It opened my eyes a little and now I see that I actually have reasons to feel the way I do.

Well, I hope you feel better, and I think that you should really consider counseling. They won't judge you, and NO problem is too small. Sometimes people use counseling for stress management, so really, nothing is too small, especially if you're feeling badly. I think you'll find that it will help you a lot.

-hugs- Good luck. Stay Safe.

[littlewhisper]

thats so not pathetic. just want to say hugs and all my love xxxxxxxxxxx