Triggering (Suicide) - Controlling thoughts

[one_step_closer]

Does anyone else experience this? I have thoughts that used to be mine but they have grown into a person of their own. They are sometimes around but sometimes aren't. They control some things that I do, they will plan my suicide and hide it from me or continually make me think about overdosing until I do it. They aren't voices and I know that no one is putting them into my head. My psychologist knows about them but my psychiatrist doesn't because she tends to do all the talking when I see her. I was recently assessed by another psychiatrist though and he didn't seem overly concerned by The Thoughts because I sometimes can have control over whether or not I act on what they want me to do.

I just want them to go away.

[Diamonds.]

Do you mean like thoughts that take over you?
They are the only thing you can think about?
x

[one_step_closer]

Not really. I mean they are like a seperate person, or people (they are three men) in my head and they have the autonomy of a person.

[bleeding black]

And ignore this if you like - but it sounds like you've cut off from the part of yourself that is having these destructive thoughts and feelings, perhaps in order to distance yourself from them, not feel them so intensely.
What do you think?

What does your psychologist say about them?
It sounds like when you see your psychiatrist you might need to sort of 'jump in' between words and let her know about them - cause it is important that she knows these sorts of things.
It doesn't sound very helpful that she does most of the talking, what kinds of things does she say?

[Stellata]

Yes.
Katrina is pretty similar in lots of ways. [My shadow/unconscious/depression that has a mind of it's own.]

I'm just dropping in briefly now, will add more later.

[Ami]

I was going to say yes but then you said

"They aren't voices and I know that no one is putting them into my head."

Which is different because people control my thoughts and make me do stuff.

I hopes you're okay lindsey. Do you think cbt might help with these thoughts? x

[farawayfairy]

Yes I get those. They're like thoughts but not - they're louder and not mine but they're also not voices and I know that no one else is putting them there.