university! advice appreciated :)

[lovelybones]

hello all,

i'm enrolled in university about an hour away from home. i'm currently debating whether to come back home for the second semester and study at a school there. my husband is there, and i miss him terribly. it would also be a lot cheaper and i could get a job (unlike here).

however, i have 3 close friends here (and a good room mate), and they would be very upset if i left. i haven't discussed this with any of them because i'm afraid i'm going to distress them. i like the campus and such, but my classes aren't that fantastic here and i'm terrified of running into my ex. i ran into him yesterday and it really upset me terribly.

any ideas on how to figure all of this out? if i want to withdraw and register at the school at home, i need to do that soon, like in the next 5-7 days. registration at the school at home begins 12 october & it's 8 october today. i'm just terrified of leaving my friends, but they are only an hour away. i'm moving out of the state this summer, so i'll have to deal with it eventually.

thank you :)

[GrimmFaerieTale]

Hey.

Okay firstly, you need to make sure you have thought it through and are definitely sure before you make any decision and follow it through. I can't stress that enough - I rushed my decision to leave my first university and it was potentially the worst decision I've ever made in my life. I'm not saying it'll be the wrong decision for you, just that you need to be sure!
I think you need to talk to your friends and your husband. I know you don't want to distress them but I think you need to get some help making this decision.
Make sure you think about everything before you make the decision! These are just some things that reading your post sprang to my mind, I'm not trying to convince you to stay just that you might want to think about them!

1) The classes may well get better next semester, are they bad enough to make you leave?

2) What happened with you and your ex? Was it bad enough to make you consider up-and-leaving to avoid him?

3) Missing your husband is perfectly natural, but it doesn't need to mean you have to leave!

4) Perhaps talk to the college/uni/school (not quite sure, sorry) and see what things might be affected - paying back any tuition fees, accommodation fees, etc etc.

I hope this doesn't sound too prescriptive, I'm just trying to encourage you to make sure that leaving is the right decision for you xXx

[lovelybones]

Thank you :)

[GrimmFaerieTale]

That's okay! Has it helped at all? xxx

[lovelybones]

Yes, I will talk to a few of my friends tonight, hopefully. The one other thing I totally forgot to mention is that my little brother is having a hard time dealing with my mom and has run off a few times. He called me a few days ago and said he felt safer with me around but doesn't anymore, and that made me feel kind of bad. I have been talking to my husband about it, and he could go either way, so we'll see.

[GrimmFaerieTale]

Okay. Well have a chat with everyone and make sure you take everything into consideration! Good luck, feel free to PM me any time xxx