Triggering (SI/OD) - ARGH!!!

[[Pixie]]

im sorry.
i know nobody really cares, i have no friends on here.
but im falling.
and im falling fast.
ive been on a three day binge. I feel so sick, so tired, so worthless. So desperate.
ive spent all day crying locking myself in my room.
i dont know what to do anymore.
i have nobody to turn to either.
i have a blade in my hand & pills by my side and ive reached breaking point.
i need them both.
i want to bleed because im so discusting and i want to fucking die because i cant take this ANYMORE!!!!!!

[~katie~]

Babe you are worth much more than you think, even if you cant see it or feel it, no one wants to see you hurt.

I know it must be really hard but you know that your stronger than this and you can get through whatever life throws at you.

If you want someone to talk to you can PM me xxxx

[mesmerized.]

Hey, please don't be sorry for posting, you do deserve help and support. And people do care. I care - I wouldn't bother replying if I didn't. I don't like to think of anyone hurting this much.

Firstly, could you put the blade and the pills away? If you can't face getting rid of them, that's fine, maybe just put them somewhere safe and out of sight, where you won't be so tempted by them. You don't need them, you can get through this safely.

Do you know what's making you feel like this just now? Has something happened, or has everything just built up? If you'd like to talk a bit more about what's going on for you, you could always post it here.

What do you think would help, instead of hurting yourself? Could you try some distractions, maybe write down how you're feeling, draw, go for a walk, whatever. I know it hurts, but you can do this. Is there anyone at all you can reach out to - family, a friend, someone professional? It really might be a good idea, you shouldn't have to do this on your own. Don't feel that you're alone in this, there's always, always going to be someone who'll be there for you - even if it means phoning the Samaritans or another helpline, or just talking here. Please PM me if you need someone, I'm always more than happy to listen.

Look after yourself, be safe. xx

[[Pixie]]

omg.
thank you both for replying it means alot because ive never felt more alone than i do now.
everything has just built up to this point, ive been slipping for awhile now tbh.
i have nobody to call:\
nobody cares if i live or if i die.
and thats the truth :(

[mesmerized.]

*offers hugs*
I'm so sorry you're feeling so alone, I know how awful it is. But I'm absolutely sure that it isn't true that no-one cares if you live or die, although I know it can feel that way. What makes you think no-one cares? What about family, or any friends? Even just people you talk to - we all make a difference in more people's lives than we realise. People here would care, I would.
Do you have any kind of professional help? Do you think it would be worthwhile?

Do you want to talk about any of the things that have built up to bring you to this point?

Seriously, PM me if you need someone. And take care of yourself, maybe do something nice for yourself. xx

[PassedExpectations]

thats not the truth... thats a lie that some part of you is telling the rest of you, and you have to try really hard to not beleive it...

[roiben]

Have you told a professional how you are feeling, a Dr, for example?