|
Triggering (SI/ED) - Worst Anxiety Since Mom Died
It's the 2nd day of school, I'm at my boyfriends house, he took my car to school. I am shivering in fear for no reason. I am missing school already. My new shrink and I don't meet until September 2nd. I have one Konopin on hand and I know how to use it.
I am a senior in highschool with only a half-day schedule. I have a wonderful boyfriend, a cool cat, and no serious physical health problems. My mom died when I was 16... that was the worst anxiety ever. Her being sick was the worst anxiety ever. After she died... gosh. No words.
But now...I am almost just as anxious and sick to my stomach. Hearing voices. I am a recovered(recovering,really) bulimic of 6 years and anorexia (less severe) but I've been so anxious I have been making myself sick just to get the endorphins. I began cutting again, desperately...
I do not know what to do. I am diagnosed as bipolar with psychotic tendencies. I have always been anxious, I've abused Klonopin... but I don't even think the Klonopin will calm me down this morning.
Heeelllllp.
|