Triggering (SI/Substance abuse) - Only feel ok wen im drunk., but then i feel so bad :(

[My_Name_Is_Aiden]

anyone know how to stop this??!
i feel like im a downward spiral. my life is just.... its bad rite now and i cant keep up, i cant BREATHE! i cant keep going and i have no one to help me,,... and i leave home, escape for a while to a library or 2 the beach and i get DRUNK, veryy drunk and i feel better. but nothing else helps!
i have over two hundred scars on my arms but i gacve up cutting myself in january after i passed out in a hospital from loss of blood and stitches... ick.... anyway, now i dont cut, alcohol is the only way i can feel better.. my medication doesnt work, my doctors are useless... but i feel sick after drinking and so miserabkle i cant staND IT! alcohol makes me forget but nothing else does! shud i go back to cutting insteatd opf drinking?? which is worse???

[lozza]

I am finding myself in the same boat hun. *hugs*
I dont know how to stop this either but just wanted you to know I am thinking of you. Feel free to pm if you ever wana chat.

[White Noise]

I know the feeling, I found that after I gave up SI I ended up drinking heavily instead. I think it was the feeling of being disconnected form everything, or of shutting off my thoughts which made me want to get drunk when things go wrong.

Also four basic questions to ask yourself:

Have you ever felt you should cut down on your drinking?

Have people annoyed you by criticizing your drinking?

Have you ever felt bad or guilty about your drinking?

Have you ever had a drink first thing in the morning (as an “eye opener”) to steady your nerves or get rid of a hangover?

These questions are often used by healthcare providers to assess if people are in need of help to stop drinking. If the answer is "yes" to two or more of the above, then you probably need to get some help with this.

From personal experience:
I'm not sure which is worse, for me, I've found that the drinking has been worse, but then I think, in comparison to many other people, my cutting problem wasn't of the same extent. I think you need to weigh it up, firstly: will stopping drinking lead to you cutting again? Or is it possible to do neither? If it is the case that you'll end up doing one or the other until you have an alternate coping strategy in place, then you'll need to look at where each one leads you, and which path you want to avoid. In the long term though, you'll need to find something which isn't damaging in order to cope.

I'm currently trying to give up drinking, and I'm a week into it. I'll say it now, it isn't an easy thing to do, but it is possible. I'm using a combination of will power, and telling people around me that I'm not drinking any more, this has meant that I've been under some peer pressure to drink (I'm student) but people closer to me have generally been supportive. The thing is, you have to make the decision that you want to stop, and genuinely want it for yourself, and then stick to it.

Apparently the amount of time it takes to establish new behaviours is 21 days. A while back I decided not to drink for three weeks, and it worked, by the end of that period, I felt fine and no longer had any cravings, although, at the end of those three weeks I reverted back in spite of having no desire to drink. My advice then, would be to set yourself a target of not drinking for a set amount of time, something which you feel you can cope with, and then go for it. Once you hit your target, extend it. If you slip up, then restart, try and beat your record. Keep doing this until you reach three weeks, if the 21 day thing is right, it should get a lot easier from there on in. Just avoid relapses.

I'm not sure if this helps, but this was my approach to stopping SI, I kept a notebook with a tally chart in it, and counted the days. Every time I got slightly further it felt like an achievement, ok, it isn't perfect, I still slip from time to time, but it got me out of the worst of it. In a way I'm repeating the same process with alcohol, I'm extending out the time without a drink by more and more until I no longer feel the need to drink. Ok, I should probably approach my GP or something, and I think that I would do if it wasn't for the feeling of stigma related to drinking problems, only you know what your ability is to deal with your problems for yourself, if you need help go and get it. If you think you can tackle this by yourself, then go and do it, but be realistic.

[88shelz]

alcohol can become hightly addictive. i stopped SI and alcoholism took over. none of these things are helpful in the long term though
you have to try be strong and positive andfight bck these addictions as tehy do more harm than good

[Cryptic.]

Neither.
Both are dangerous.
Both can be lethal.
Both are unhealthy.

You need to put a stop to this, and fight back.
I've been fighting both self harm (been doing it since I was 7, so that's more than half my life) and binge drinking urges (since I was 13), and yes, it is hard, but it is not going to be easy. You have the strength though. You just need to believe in yourself and battle back. Reach out for help. Because I assure you, carry on this road... and you'll destroy yourself.

Goodluck.

[My_Name_Is_Aiden]

thank u all for your advice.
i'm feeling a little better tonite.. i mite try doing the 21 days without alcohol but dont kno if im strong enough,but anyway thanks for letting me know there are people who really do care on this forum. cheers
i really do feel better knowing other people have had the same problem

[My_Name_Is_Aiden]

well that didnt last long........
i just CANNOT deal with my life ritenow and i not only got drunk today but cut myself as well 4 the first time since january. now i feel so bad and stupid that all i can tihnk of to feel better is to get more drunk :(
thanks for trying to help me tho but i tihnk im sort of a lost cause tonite.....

[vampychick]

i was drinking today and for the first time in ages i didnt hurt myself
if i did do it, i burned myself with cigarettes,

[Angel_of_Urs]

I too am suffering with this exact situation. However I'm currently drinking and cutting far more than I have for a long while. I have got myself back into all sorts of messes and its my own fault =( what a mess.

Big hugs =(