Triggering (SI) - What's the point?

[Solstice]

I hate whining, but I am feeling frustrated with things getting better and then messing up again. Bad news today. Not going into detail.

Anyways, I don't know why I even bother trying to recover anymore, nearly all of my friends think I am recovered unless they read the posts I post on here. Sometimes I want to say "dont' you see it, I just want you to notice and listen, I don't need you to fix me, just listen, no one ever listens" Everyone just wants to fix me, really all I want them to do is listen and let me know I am not alone in this. I had a friend yesterday say something like "don't worry, they are there for me too so you are not alone", I just wanted to hug her.

This stupid SI is going to affect me for the rest of my life no matter what I do now, for the rest of my life I will have the scars. Even if I never cut one more time, the scars are never ever going away. What is the point in stopping? Most people stop because they don't want the scars or they don't want their SI affect them anymore but it's going to no matter what, so please just tell me, what is the point anymore? Recovery is hard and even though I try for it, I am just not sure why I do anymore.

[bunsy]

ill listen to you :) anytime at all, you arent alone you are never alone theres all these people here to help and offer their support, the point of you stopping is because life is music, play it louder.

The scars will be scars, things in the past and if people ever ask you can just say - yeah i fought my demons, im over it and look how strong i am now

you can do this
pm any time x x
life is music, play it louder
Bunsy xx

[shadow-light]

scars do fade... and once you've stopped you can even have treatment to get rid of them.


there is one more reason to stop... and that is the danger factor... the wounds get deeper and deeper, bigger and bigger... more and more dangerous