Triggering (SI/OD) - I'm such a f***ing failure

[Faustus]

Its all f***ed up. I feel like such a failure i just wanna cut, and take enough of my meds that i can no longer feel like this. In the last 12 months i have lost my gf of 6 yrs (this time last yr we were planning a wedding), my mum no longer wants anything to do with me and is putting my dad through a messy divorce. I have not been at work this week cos im in too much to get on a bus and go in, and i now their busy and short staffed as i currently live with someone i work with whose on holiday this week and when i stumble out of my room for a smoke or cup of tea i get passive aggressive comments about how she thought i was ill. I just wanna give up fighting, i have had this disease for 17yrs and i feed up with the pain, with letting people down it screwing everything up. Arrggggggg. Idk want i want from posting i think i needed to say it out loud and you guys are the only people that l have. Sorry for ranting

[wyngednight]

remember i love you :)
pm if you need it :)
sorry your feeling down, *hugs* but your not ever a failure. you might fail, but that does not make you a failure. you are special, you are someone :)
love you <3

[bunsy]

ranting is good - im sorry that you feel the way you do i also love you too
pm me also anytime youre not a failure, we all have those times where we are down and feel alone - but we are never alone rant away go ahead we dont mind!!!

life is music, play it louder
Bunsy X X

[Faustus]

Thank you for your replies. It means a lot to know someone gives a toss. Normally i quite strong but its all too much right now, if i could make it all go a way without causing pain to people i would.